So i love my sons father with everything i have. But we fight ALL the TIME. Right now i have a no contact order against him because he hit me while i was holding our son, and when we went to court he denied him so as of right now he has no rights to him. But the thing is he blames me for it all. Hes the one that has cheated on me but he is always accusing me of cheating on him and going out all the time. I work two jobs and take care of aydin on my own, i dont have time to go out. He says i always have a attitude and thats why he gets so mad at me. Then he says that im always looking for attetion from guys, when i dont even talk to anyone and i have caught him talking to other girls.
I really love him, and i feel so alone with out him, but at the sametime he brings me down to where im depressed and have no self esteem. Will it ever be better or should i just do what i can to walk away. ( i've tried but I love him that much to keep trying and giveing more chances)
I REALLY DONT GET HIM
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Mon, 2007-02-26 16:23
#1
I REALLY DONT GET HIM
He is just insecure about himself so he acts that way, that's how my husband is, they are jealous and controlling. It's just not healthy for anyone to be in a relationship like that. The only way anything will change is if he can admit what he's doing wrong and go get councelling because it really all just stems from their own insecurities with themselves. I personally cannot deal with it, I can't stand my husband and I'm usually yelling at him or hitting him for some reason, it's really just very unhealthy. Unless he can truly change and change for good I would suggest you leave cuz it's very emotionally damaging for everyone involved. I know I need to take my own advice, the worst part is that I know all this and somehow I'm still here :?. I hope things work out for you either way.
The reason why he does that is because he is an abuser. He makes you feel like that because that way nothing will ever be his fault, everything will be your fault and your self esteem will suffer. You need to leave. Someone who loves you will never hit you or make you feel like you are a bad person. They won't accuse you of cheating and they won't cheat on you. You got the no contact order, use that as a way to get him out of your mind and out of your life. He obviously doesn't want anything to do with your son, seeing as he denied him in court. I know it is hard and I know you still love him, but please take this opportunity to leave and get out of this abuse.
I have been in pretty much the same situation as you, feel free to pm me if you need to talk at all.
I'm wondering why you love him?
Anyways, whatever the reasons are, none make up for what he's doing for you. Love is about trust. There is no trust there, or else he wouldn't be cheating on you, and he wouldn't be accusing you of cheating on him. It's a bad relationship, and I can guarantee that you can do better, and deserve better.
Don't you feel you deserve to be loved and respected?
take care.