omg.. i dont even no what to do.. i feel terrible..
ok jailee dad got his girlfriend pregnant.. ok ok no big deal im happy for her.. but the thing is on her blog on myspace she put "blahblahblah were gunna get married blahblah hes gunna be such a great dad!.. to our baby!! hes so excited!"..
i read it and shut down.. not because i want him back (at all!).. its the fact that he loves that baby and not jailee.. :cry: ..
i dont no what to think.. im just so sad for jailee now..
I;m sorry that that's how it worked out for you. I can't rellly offer any kind of adivce, but you'll be in my thoughts. Just remember that Jailee doesn't need him becuae he's got YOU. Feel better, mama. *hugs*
maybe you want to get on myspace and remind your boyfriends' girlfriend about the stellar job he's doing fathering his current child. :roll:
Tell her the story behind you and your ex, perhaps there are some parallels in your relationships, and -maybe- ask her to reconsider her choice to continue the pregnancy, but support her whatever she chooses, it could be that you become good allies in the future, if he skips out on her, too.
I'd make it clear that you only have the best intentions (hah, only if you do, though!) and you just want her to be aware of what she could be getting herself into.
I don't know about that emily. I definitely don't suggest saying anything to her about not continuing the pregnancy, that could make her look really bad. Like she's jealous and wants to be the only one with his kid or that she's trying to use jailee to get him back and if he has another baby she won't be able to.
I think we can all admit how strange relationships are between former gfs and new gfs, especially when there are kids involved. And how new gfs often WANT to believe that the former girl is some horrible person because it's so hard to admit that the guy you're going out with just isn't worth the time.
I know my ex had me hard core convinced that it was all his ex's fault. She was the reason he wasn't paying child support, she was the reason for everything. It wasn't until he compared me to her during the breakup that I realized all the crap he was pulling on me he'd pulled on her as well and I woke up.
Yeah, I wouldn't deal with her through Myspace. Do you think you could arrange to meet her for a chat or talk to her on the phone sometime when BD isn't around?
If she is continuing the pregnancy, the child will be your daughter's half-sibling. And if BD is such a shit to you, there's every chance he could turn around and do it to this woman too. It would be cool if you were able to be cool with each other and work towards being a support system for each other.
I think it would be a good idea to sit down and have a conversation with her too. I think it is important in a situation like this to try to be civil with each other, because her baby is going to be your baby's half sibling and they will more likely than not have some kind of contact with each other throughout their lives.
I think this is a good point, and something to keep in mind if you do decide to talk to her. Honestly, I wouldn't even bring up your relationship with him unless she wants to talk about it. It doesn't really do any good to tell someone their boyfriend is an asshole when they aren't going to listen. If you feel comfortable, you could offer to help her if she is having issues with him but even that I would be careful with.
Like a year ago, bd was dating this girl who had kids and he told me that he considered them more of his kids than mine because he saw them more and got to take care of them. I know its not exactly the same thing but it hurts to think that your kids father likes/loves other kids more than yours. I guess I don't really have any advice on that. But it is not uncommon to feel that way, and it doesn't mean you still love him or want to be with him.
I wouldn't take the "he's going to be a great dad, we're getting married!" stuff seriously until you witness it. A lot can change over 9 months.
I laughed out loud at the pp's idea of reminding her what a stellar job he's doing fathering his current child. No kidding! There's nothing to say that he won't abandon her & baby, either....she has some nerve to be so confident in him and to flaunt it when you know him so much differently.
You and Jailee sound as though you're better off without him. So many moms here would support you in that, I know it.
Ohhh, I dislike those kinda girls. Not because of how proud they are to be having your child's half sibling, but because of the lack of knowledge they are unaware of. I mean seriously, your BD isn't even there for his firstborn, what makes her think he wants to be there for a second one? I seriously think she needs to have a reality check, and open her eyes a bit more.
I just suggest reminding the gf about how BD isn't even there for you, and just tell her that you are happy, but to keep an eye out for BD because you never know if he'll pull another ditch.
Nothing will be certain until she has the baby. And then you can see if he really loves that kid more than yours. It sounds to me like she's just being a rude, ignorant, selfish girl who feels the need to try to make you feel like crap. Maybe she, herself, is insecure and that just doesn't fly, so she needs to bring you down along with her. Don't let these words hurt you. They're only hurtful words.
When i found out my sons fathers girlfriend was pregnant, i really just blew it off. Me and him have been split for almost 2 years. shes actually due 1 month or so after me.
How i see it is i know im there for my son and so isnt my bf so if his father chooses to be there for his new baby more then his son hes the one that has to look himself in the mirror.
also his gf knows how he is with my son, there when he wants, so if she feels hell be a better dad to her kid then hey thats great.
Just know YOUR there for your baby! Thats most important.
Keep in mind that "that baby" doesn't really exist yet. A pp said that a lot can change in 9 months, which is so true, and even moreso when a real live baby enters the picture. Of course she's gonna wanna think "my baby daddy is gonna be just perfect!" when she doesn't have to deal with any of the realities of whether or not he actually is. That doesn't say anything about what kind of father he will actually be (or whether he'll end up stepping up to the plate and being one at all.) Right now, his relationship with jailee is the only measure of what kind of father he is, not her wishfull thinking or any promises he might make her. She would do well to realize that.