Just about 2 years ago I was diagnosed with a lupus like disorder. They have been searching to find what it is exactly. I have almost all the symptoms of lupus, and a positive ANA but my lupus test was negative. We finally think we may have found out what it is. Behcets. Not a great disease. I have been going to the dr about once a month and getting rounds of tests done each time. I keep getting new symptoms and old ones keep getting worse. When I was pregnant with Kiara I started getting these muscle spasms or twitches. They have continued to get worse, becoming ridiculous if Im stressed or extremely tired. They have actually gotten to the point where they are no longer twitches but more like seizures, I have to have a consult with a neurologist to find out exactly what they are. Im also getting a nerve conduction test done because my arms keep going numb. They were thinking it was carpel tunnel but its goig up my arms, so im getting that done July 16th. I also have been having "panic attacks" for the last 9 months or so. My heart starts pounding and I get butterflies adn my adrenaline pumps. But the antianxiety meds they gave me never helped and it just didnt make sense because they would come out of no where with no reason, like I would be cooking dinner or changing the babies diaper. I was in my dr about 2months ago when I got one of those attacks. My heart rate was 155!! Really high! My dr did some natural remedies to see if he could get it down, if not he was going to send me tot he ER. Well he got it down, but wanted to see if there was a reason for it. So I got a U/S of my heart done in the beginning of May. They kept telling me they didnt have my results back and I was getting frusterated. 6 weeks went by and then my dr's office called saying they wante dto set up an appt to get my results read and refill all my meds since he doesnt do refills. I really didnt think anything would be wrong. Well I was wrong! I have 2 leaks in my heart. One in the right ventricle and one in the mitro valve. Apparently its not suppposed to be dangerous but thats what is causing the high heart rate, my heart rate doesnt go under 110 anymore. They have started me on a beta blocker. I'm also on a muscle relaxant. And an inhaler for my asthma that has gotten out of control, and now Im getting tested for seizures, my arhtritis continues to progress. Im in a lot of pain and I hate it. Im always tired, and sleep soo much! I hate it, its not fair. Its just one thing after another. I just want all the positive results to stop, dont I have enough to deal with? An autoimmune disorder, that has caused arthritis, chronic UTI's, chronic fatigue, asthma, migranes, heart problems, and now probably neuro problems. im too young for all of this. I just dont understand how all this happened????? Its getting really hard to deal. I dunno . . . . I just needed to vent. Thanks for listening to me.