I've been dating my boyfriend for about two months now and I just found out a few days ago I'm pregnant. I took an EPT test in his grandparents bathroom. When I saw the two pink lines I just sat there and stared at it in disbelief. I'm not really upset about being a mom, I'm upset as to what my dad will think. He's always been proud of me for making the right choices in life, and I know he'll be really disappointed in me. I feel very lost and alone, everytime I confront my boyfriend he just stares at me, unknowing as to what he can do. I feel for him aswell, I know this is tough for him and he also has a lot of mixed feelings but I need him so much. I just want to hide under a rock forever right now.
My mom died when I was 12 and I don't come in much contact with family except my father. I'm just so afraid of telling him, so afraid of seeing...hearing him cry. I don't want that to happen, I always want to be his little girl who ran around the house and played. I'm 18, and when I had my last birthday my dad got teary-eyed because he knew I was growing up. I know that he'll adjust but I don't want to see the heart break in his face.
I have all these weird ups and downs, where I get so happy and excited about the baby but then I just want to be a little girl again. I never realized how precious being carefree and small was until now. I don't have any siblings so sometimes I just wished for a baby, someone to love and that was mine. My family doesn't really include me so I always wanted a person in my life that was real family, that always needed me there for them. I'm afraid as to how we'll ever afford a child, how we'll ever make it by happily. I just pray to God this all works out. I'm really afraid right now...just wanted to vent. Thanks for any support.