Now that I'm pregnant and Ryans mom knows she's planning on getting things that we need for her house and I'm worried if the baby goes there without me that she'll pack up and leave with the baby. Should I tell her I have to be there at ALL times with the baby?
Tell her.
If you're not comfortable with any sort of situation like that, definitely speak up and let your voice be heard.
I agree. You should definitely talk to her about it. If you're concerned about her taking YOUR child, you really do need to let it be known. Can I ask why you think she'll take off with the baby?
Really, it's up to you. You have to provide the safest space you can for your child and for yourself. If there's something that another person is doing that makes you feel uncomfortable, then you do what you feel is right. If you don't want it to turn into an argument, you could always try saying that you aren't going to feel comfortable with anyone being with your child unsupervised for quite some time, and so for at least the first while until you get more comfortable with things, that you'll be with your child when he/she visits.
i agree with everyone i think if you are not comfortable speak up and say something because it is your choice if you let her alone with your child. i agree with spending time over there to see if she does well. just supervise at first
If you ever feel uncomfortable with someone taking your child and are worried about her taking off or Just taking her period , then you have to be strong and stand your ground...Please speak up and dont let her Rule You...Your the childs Parent ,you make the decisions for the baby ok...You are your own person now use that to your advantage ...feel free to reply.
Im a 39 yr old mom and I know what its like to lose a child to someone else....Be careful and look for help if needed!!!!! Keep me posted ok...thx for listening... :!:
you are the mother (to be) and it is your choice.
People give me advice or tell me what to do sometimes and well you need to speak up BUT to avoid confrentation try to be as nice as you can. Good luck!
I would tell her that yes the baby can come to her house but that you'll plan on being there at all times with the baby. I understand how you feel, I would never leave my MIL alone with any of my kids, although I don't think she'd pack up and leave on me, I just don't trust her to watch them closely enough. Can I ask why you think she'd take off with the baby?
have you talked to Ryan about this. I'm not sure if you are with him or not. if not he might get desensive about you making accusations about his mom so you'll have to be careful how you bring it up. I agree with naivete, it might avoid an argument if you say you will be uncomfortable with the baby having overnight visits or even any babysitting while he/she is still so young. hopefully you feel more comfortable with her over time. is there any other reason you think she might take you baby? even just getting a bad vibe from someone is worth being cautious about. but i know a lot of people who have relatives who buy things for the baby to keep at their house for when the baby is visiting. some grandparents go overboard because they're so excited. but definitly talk to Ryan about the bad vibe your getting from his mom.
I echo what everyone else had said. If you are feeling uncomfortable with the situation, speak up. Even if it's just a feeling, bad vibes ... they are here for a reason. Motherly instinct works. You are fighting for your and your baby's well-being, and that's always the best thing to fight for. Good luck to you and keep us updated.
There is no need for her to be alone with baby anyway, unless you are volunteering baby over for a few hours out or something. If Ryan lives with her and wants the baby he can stay with the baby, no need for him/her to ever be alone, kwim?
You know what? my boyfriends mother was saying somthing about how she could sucessfully sue for custody and win....he told me she was joking, but I too, feel very uncomfortable about leaving the baby alone...because it was just be devestating if she packed up and left.
Its your baby. You had 9 months to bond with it, and develop a strong instinct that will tell you when somethings wrong. If you feel uncomfortable with that stiuation, you have to right to not leave your baby un-attended. You dont even have to tell the father...just make excuses, and if that fails, just gently explain to him why. Hes going to be a father too...so he SHOULD understand why you are concerned.
I dont think you absolutly need to tell her. If she asks, just tell her you dont feel comfortable being away from your child, a simple as that...I wasnt planning on saying anything to my mother-in-law to be, becuase i just figure that will cause more bad feelings, and give her even more reason to do something horrible.