I dont know if i told you guys or not but i'm not with my BD i just called him my b/f to make things sound easier. We have been having sex this past year we've been broken up. Before I got pregnant he said that he wanted both of us to date but not have sex with other people. But now that i'm pregnant and i heard he asked a girl on a date sat. night. It just upsets me so much more then it did before!! :cry:
I just called him and asked him if we could talk about "us". Cause I'm so scared that if he decides that he doesn't want to be with me, then when we have a child together, i will be all alone and he will be out dating and falling in love with someone else! Cause its a FACT that guys don't like girls as much if they have a child BUT girls dont mind if a guy has a child. :( He said that he has been thinking about our living situation and our status but he hasn't come to a decision. And while i wait... he is out dating other people!! I just can't take it! It hurts. :cry: I know I shouldn't be waiting but I'm not going to go out and date because I'm carrying his child and I particularly don't care to date right now.
I'm sorry im just venting and I got so upset when i just got off the phone with him cause it seems like he is just blowing me off cause he said i'm so dramatic about it and im just trying to tell him how important it is that we need to talk. And hes one of those guys who hates to talk. So he said when he's ready he'll tell me. But I need to know NOW! and i need to know his motives! :(
You don't need the guy. He is bad for you. You do not deserve to be treated like this. He is obviously not committed to you, so it is probably best for you if you just leave him. It will be harder on you to wait and keep getting hurt by him, and you can certainly do this on your own.
Hon, check out the thread in this forum called "Giving up on BD". Me & Bethany31 have been talking about the same sort of shit, and how to move on once you realize that the BD sucks.
You're not alone. We'll be there for you every step of the way. Right now, what's important is US and having healthy pregnancies. We can't force our BDs to do ANYTHING, including giving us straight answers about how they're going to be there for us. I, personally, have stopped counting on my BD for anything and if he chooses to do something, I'll be pleasantly surprised :)
((((Tracy))))
ok....so I dont want to sound like I am repeating Wonderwall...but...
WELCOME TO OUR CLUB!!!
Like she said, read the "giving up on BD" post....we know what you are going through, and we are here for you for everything!! I have made up so many excuses and tried to get BD to understand and tried to make him be apart of this....but I am realizing you cant change these guys....no matter what we do....its up to them to change and maybe they never will? But we have bigger things to focus on now...and I know that this is way easier said than done, because yeah I can sit here and say that to you....while still trying to work out almost the exact same shit. So, I am just kind of rambling now....but we are here for you no matter what...PM me if you need to talk...and keep your head up!
-Beth
I can't say much now, but girlie, it's NOT a "fact" that guys don't like women as much if they have a child. If a guy doesn't like you because you have a child (or will in the future), he's probably not worth your time in the first place.
And for personal experience, I have had zero problem dating or men being interested in me since I've had a child.
I don't mean to be totally obvious or sound like an asshole, but it sounds like he just does not have the same type of feelings for you that you have for him. If he wants to date other people, that is his choice. You also have the option to do so! Please don't waste anymore time worrying about what he wants from you. Think about what you want for yourself.
I think he's playing games with you and I think you need to be around people who will be supportive and not cause you more stress.
I don't think having a child will mean a guy won't be interested in you. Someone worth your time will accept you for you no matter what.
If you don't feel like dating anyone else now, don't. We don't need to be in relationships all the time. I know during my first pregnancy I often felt like being alone - I avoided friends that were bad for me, I read alot, slept, rested spent time alone. There is nothing wrong with being alone.
You're going through alot right now - focus on you and get rid of him if he is going to cause you stress and heartbreak
I don't think he's worth it... Think about what you want. Do you really even want him? Or just want him to be the person he was when you first met, or be the person you think he could be but never really has been. You can do it alone. In fact, it will be easier without the emotional roller coaster of this guy. Hang in there.