so on friday my fiance and i are going to have an ultrasound to determine the sex of our baby. i'm sooooooooooo freakin' excited!
i keep trying to imagine what life with the baby on the outside will be like, but then i start thinking about what's happening inside of me and what's growing in there.
my fiance keeps saying "it better be a boy"... but when i think about having a little boy inside of me, it kinda creeps me out, like i have this litle mini penis inside of me at all times... i know it'd be my son, but still... i guess i just think about the things my fiance and i do in the bedroom and i'm nervous about the day when i find out what my kids will do... :shock:
then that makes me even more nervous to have a girl, because, although its double standard of society, i feel like i'd have to protect my daughter more... then i see my younger sister going out and get really protective of her- what she wears, who she's with, what they're doing, if there will be parental supervision... it drives me and her crazy, but i guess its just my motherly instincts kicking in.
the baby inside
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Thu, 2006-06-22 01:23
#1
the baby inside
It worries me that your boyfriend says it had "better be a boy". How will he react if it's not?
Why is it so important for you to find out the sex? In this type of situation, it may be better to be surprised. ANy dissapointment you may think you or him will feel may be eased if you're actually holding your baby.
i'm a very "orderly" kind of person... if that's the right word/way to put it. i like to plan as much as possible and have always hated surprises. i know that with a baby i can't plan out its life day by day and that i should expect many things coming that i've never i've experienced or thought about. but when i am surprised, i'm not the kind of person that acts out, but ends up going with the flow- and most of the time liking it better. i have no preference as to what sex of my baby is, i know that i will love it no matter what.
i guess finding out if its a boy or girl makes me feel a little more prepared. i grew up with a lot of older boys- brother and cousins, so i was a tomboy for a long time. but i also have two little sisters that have always been super girly-girl and i did do cheerleading and dance when i was young. i guess i'm just trying to get a feel for what my baby may be like. but then again, if i have a son who wants to dance or a daughter that wants to play football, i'd let him/her. but just knowing what's inside of me makes me feel a little more prepared.
as for my fiance, i know that he'd prefer a boy. i think he may feel a little pressure from his family though, since he is the oldest son and they tell him he needs to carry on the family name. his sister just had a baby girl, his cousin is expecting a baby girl around the same time as us, and he and i have both commented on how many more little girl babies we see than boys while we're out. i'm not worried about him being disappointed with having a girl though... we saw a little girl shirt that said "i make chunky thighs look good" in pink and he cracked up and got it to put on our baby, no matter what it is. he also talks about times when he'd let his cousins dance on his shoes with him, and how he'd love to have a little girl of his own to do that with.
yeah, i wanted to know what sex my baby was going to be as well, just because i figured i would be surprised enough when she was born and i wanted to get a hard start on shopping for baby stuff and picking out names.
i also wanted to know what i was having. my boyfriend was convinced it was a boy and even said "it better be a boy" but once we had the ultrasound he really was just amazed at how developed the baby looked that i dont think he cared too much . i am having a girl by the way...... sometimes we will see baby boy clothes or something and he makes a joke sad face. but i know he was dissapointed but now he is exited as i could hope for... he picks out clothes for her and talks about her.... she doesnt have a name yet but oh well. but the point is hopefully your bf will warm up to the idea like mine did. good luck!!! i always think the ultrasounds are so exiting! but i've only had 2 so maybe thats why.
The whole ''it had better be a boy'' thing, brings back memories... bad ones! Thru my whole pregnancy my partner wanted a boy so bad coz it was in their 'family tradition' to have a boy at 23 yrs old. Chris was 23 when i was pregnant and he was determined to have a boy... when we had the scan to tell us how healthy the baby was (main thing!!) and she said 'do you want to know the sex?' we said yeah and she said it was a girl.. he said 'are you sure??' with DISGUST!! I was sickened with his reaction! He didnt speak to me the whole time on the car ride home and as i dropped him at the station to go to work, he didnt even say bye, just slammed the door.
He went straight to the pub and got hammered.
Since then he's been drinking non stop, and not bothering to come home at all let alone call me to say where he is. He works in london, a 2 hour train away and i was home alone with a 2 weeks old baby and he was out til the next morning even on just a tuesday!! He was pure evil coz she was a girl! You'd think he'd be glad she was healthy! I kept saying, would you prefer a sick boy or a healthy girl.. and he said girl i suppose..
He's only just stopped drinking and realising he cant walk over me and pick Jaycee up when he feels like it and put her down coz its a weekend to drink. She was 2 last friday.
Tell him if its a girl then its down to him coz its the sperm that decides!!
Sorry if that all upset u, im sure it wont be the same for you, just let him know his place!! It was hard for me to go thru all that just coz of her gender. He's got over it now and has been sober for 3 months. I guess he had the underlined problem anyway and the fact she was not a boy just topped it off or made an excuse for drinking 24/7. Even times i thought i was in labour, id call him and his friend would answer saying hes passed out in pub loo or sleeping in the canal... just what a pregnant woman needs when shes in labour!!
Wanker.
Oh well, sorry for stealing your thunder on this post! Just thought id share my experience!!
Im sure he wont be as bad!
Just tell him it takes on cell thing to make a boy but thousands to make a girl! It will be his lil acheivement!!
Hope you get what you want and more importantly, the baby is healthy and happy!!
Love to u!!
xxx
You know, knowing the sex of your baby doesn't tell you a thing about who they are or what kind of person they'll be. It doesn't even tell you what gender they'll identify as.
So true!!!
(but i still think it's fun to find out, ESPECIALLY if you don't really care, because then you're happy either way. i just wanted to know everything i could about my baby as soon as i could know it.)
so we went to have an ultrasound and the baby looked big and healthy.
then after about 10-15 mins of me rolling from side to side, the doc was able to get between the baby's legs to show us a happy little girl.
my partner was holding my hand and he had a smile on from ear to ear, and was practically prancing out of the doc's office to the car still holding my hand and swinging it about a hundred miles an hour.
neither of us really cared what the baby's sex turned out to be, we just really wanted to know.
i did talk with him about why he wanted a boy so badly, though. and his answer was "i think a boy would be easier". getting deeper into this, he said he pretty much saw it like this- he is a boy, so if we had a boy he'd feel like he'd know more about how to handle situations with a son.
i think a lot of this comes from us living with my family and him seeing how my parents have to deal with my younger (14y/o) sister and her teenage hormones- dating, shopping, make up, etc.- and it makes him nervous thinking about having to take on all that responsibility- especially when it comes to dating our daughter, because he and i were no saints and i guess no daddy wants to think of his lil girl having sex.
my sister and i are very different. i've always been a bit more of a tomboy with a slight girly edge and always geared more towards simple and nature driven activities, and she's been the "girly girl" of the family since her first pair of jelly sandals when she was 2 and spends no less than half her week at the mall. my fiance is afraid that our daughter will be a super "high maintenance" girl like my sister, but i've reassured him that our girl will become her own person and choose her own influences, so the possibilities of what she will like or do are endless.
either way, we are both happy and excited to have a little girl coming into our lives.
*note: i don't want anyone thinking that i'm putting down "girly girls". i love my sister, and even though i don't personally enjoy all the material things that she likes to have, i let her do as she does, because just like any one else, its her choice and who am i to tell her whats right, wrong, or best for her own self.
Aw, congratulations. It sounds like you guys have a great attitude towards parenting.
congrats on your baby girl!
shalisa
congrats!!!
hahaha...the mental image of him dancing his way though the parking lot make me laugh so hard! Congrats on the baby girl! Have you though of names yet?
him dancing is always funny... he never really can do anything past "the twist" with an occasional butt wiggle for me... its kinda like 2 year olds dancing...lol!
as far as baby names go, sheesh... there are soo many!
in the tops are:
briley... riley was an idea for a boy
audrey... after ms. hepburn of course
charlotte... dont know why but like it, and had a great grandma w/ name
evelyn... he chose this one, and i just like it too
the man likes briley evelyn, but i'm not too sure. i like unique names but love the classics too.
he was set on the names miles laser or riley cannon for a boy, cuz ya know, boys and sci-fi or old guns are awesome... :roll: now he's trying to think of things that are the feminine counterparts to these, but we'll see if they're used or not :) :P
These were almost names my daughter had, I love them, they were in my top five for sure
Congrats on the lil girl...my boyfriend was opposite of that he wanted a little girl and the day of my sonagram came and he didnt come into the room because he wanted me to suprise him by buying the baby somthing pink for a girl and blue for a girl. well i went to the store picked somthing up brought it home and he said did u pick up the wrong color as i showed him blue booties. I could have killed him. I then told him that he should be happy to know that his son is very healthy and is doing great. After about a week he started warming up to the fact that we are havin a son. He is very excited now buying so many things and trying to think of all the possible things he will be able to teach are son....like writing his name in the snow :shock: he has even picked out his name. now he is counting the days down until he can bring jayson michael home.
I'm totally embarassed, but bd and I cried when we found out Cae was a boy.