I was reading thru another post in Pregnancy and Birth and I saw another mama said how negatively her and BD's moms acted when she told them she was pregnant. Both of which got pregnant and a young age. I had the same problem with my MIL who got pregnant at 17...
so what would you do if your kid came home at 15 or 18 and said they were pregnant/had gotten a girl pregnant??? How would you react??? Would you support them???
I know I would never treat my son or a girl he gets pregnant like my MIL did. The things she said to me right after we told her still bother me now. It really hurt and I know I wouldn't react to it like she did.
I would support any choice my daughter made if she became pregnant. To the fullest.
My g-ma got married and had 3 kids by 21. I am, always have been very very close to her, I'm, that favorite grandkid ;) but the things she said to me when she found out, oh dear, it was horrible. I considered never speaking to her again.
If I have a son, I'll help any way I can, support the girl however possible, and do my best to make it easier for them.
Yeah, that was me, heh. Anyway, BD's mom had 3 kids by 21 and my mom had 2 by 21. They both were pretty pissed and BD's mom was much moreso...
If my son got a girl pregnant I would support him and the decision that was made, and I would try to support the girl as much as I could. If I had a daughter, I'd support her in whatever decision she felt was right for her.
Well, I have two boys. If they came home & said they had gotten a girl pregnant I would tell them that no matter what his feelings are for the girl, it is his responsibility to support her in whatever decision she chooses to make. And if she chose to keep the baby & raise it, I would let him know that he needs to get a job ASAP, and that he WILL be paying child support. And I would try to be supportive of the girl, without overstepping my boundaries.
It pisses me off when I hear of the mother of the BD being an ass about the situation. It's nobody's fault (most of the time), so why not make the best of the situation?
If my son got a girl pregnant, I would be supportive of both of them and be calm about the situation.
If my daughter became pregnant, I would try to be calm about it, and I would talk to her BD to find out what he thinks and what he plans. Throughout the pregnancy, I would give advice if asked for it, and I would support her throughout the entire thing. I would mostly let her do things on her own unless she requests help because I know how much I hated it when my mother helped me when I didn't want it or didn't help when I did want it.
I completely agree with what you said. If Keenan comes home, either it be at 15, or at 19 and said he got a girl pregnant, I would tell him to support her in whatever decision she makes, and that if she chooses to keep it, that he would need to go out and find a job, and be supportive. No son of mine will disrespect a girl/woman by not supporting his child. I plan on raising my son with the upmost respect for women, including her reproductive rights.
If the girls parents would kick her out or something, I would take her in given financial abilities. And help her out if she asked me too, but not butt in if she didn't want the help/advice.
If I ever have more children and it happens to be a daughter, I would fully support her in any decisions she made.
Why would I be hypocritical about it? I had my son at 17, why would I get mad over it? Ya know? I mean, I don't know, I could probably become a little upset, but I would get over it pretty quickly.
If Riley got pregnant at a young age..I would of course be a littl ebit upset (naturally), but I wouldn't make her feel like her lifes over bcus its not unless she chooses so. She can still go to school AND be a mom. I'll help her out emotionally bcus thats where she'll be needing the help the most. I'll NEVER make her feel like Im ashamed of her. Shes my daughter and Im gonna love her no matter what. I would help her out financially some but I want to give her a hand up not a hand out bcus she would need to realize that its her baby and her responsibility to be the mom (if she chose to parent). If she chose abortion or adoption..I would be there every step of the way to support her. If I have a son sometime, and he gets a girl pregnant he will get a job and pay child support, and I will hope that he has enough respect to have a relationship with his child(if the mom chooses to carry to term), because I hope I raised him well enough to know hes the DAD, no matter what he thinks of the mom. If the pregnant girl chooses abortion, or adoption, I will tell him he needs to support her and if money is an issue for an abortion and thats what she wants, I would try to help with what I could. If her parents kicked her out and she asked for my help, I would take her in if money allowed that.
If my son came home and told me he got someone pregnant at a young age well I would stand by him. If he wanted nothing to do with the baby then well I would kick his butt!!! I would make him help her out and well his father feels the same way. It's just the "right" thing to stick by that person in anyway. You shouldnt have to marry them or be with them. I think the right thing is to stick by your child and pay child support or help raise the baby. I just hope this doesn't happen. Damn I don't want to think about 15 years from now!! AHHH! I will be 33!!!!!!
id like to instill in my son if hes going to have sex that he needs to be responsible. dont rely on the girl for birth control (and condoms protect from STIs and such). and getting tested regularly is important.
jeremy isnt a big fan of condoms which really bothers me so i dont want lucien getting the idea that pulling out and "get the girl on the pill" is the way to go.
but if he got his girlfriend, or a girl in general pregnant, yeah - time to get a job. and i would tell him "dont be an uncaring asshole!"
http://www.girlmom.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=483&sid=29f6622871b3d8668ef58afab0ca3cb5
There's another thread on the same subject that I thought you might be interested in, this one took place in social justice a while back.
Of course I dont want my children to become parents at such a young age, but I would support both of my sons..and I would NOT react the way my parents reacted. They called me hurtful names, told me they wanted nothing to do with the baby or me, and said I was a disgrace. They have since changed their minds and their opinions, but it still hurts to think about it.
Also..if either of my boys fathered a child you would bet MY ASS that they would be helping raise that child. I would not let either of my boys turn their backs on their obligations. The parents who dont make their children take care of their responsibilities is just plain wrong! I would never allow either one of my boys to act like that...over my DEAD body!!
Misfit, I couldnt agree with you more. :D