Just looking for some input on the situation from other people who have been there... :(
Apparently my babydaddy is harassing my best friend's sister (17 year old sister) to let him take nude pictures of her.
Before I got pregnant, the lot of us (he, my gal pal, her sis and I) did a lot of kinda crazy drinking parties. We've all had sex with him. But the last time was at least 6 months ago and my gal pal and her sis have repeatedly made it clear to him that it was just drunken stupidity and wasn't going to happen again.
I thought he was cool with that. I thought he and I were being honest. I've been honest with him. But then he goes behind my back and does this. :(
He and I aren't dating, we never have been. We were/are just "friends with benifits" so part of me feels like it's not my business what he does with other women. But I can't stop feeling like crap. It feels so disrespectful to me and his child. He's older then me so he should know better too.
:?
What would you do? Would you be mad? I don't know how I should feel.
Well- because you aren't together, I wouldn't call it CHEATING persay- but low and creepy, yes.
Especially if this woman is against doing it and he keeps pressuring her to, that's bullshit! It sounds like he isn't treating you with respect, he CLEARLY isn't treating OTHER women with respect. Just because (and I'm aware you know this, but it must be reiterated) a woman has sex with a guy ONCE- in ANY mental state, does not mean she is obligated in any way, shape, or form to have sex, or to have ANYTHING to do with him again if she doesn't want to.
I don't think it's cheating completely. After all, you weren't "together". But I think he should have more respect for women and be more considerate. You should also talk to him about your "friends with benefits" situation you're in and let him know what you expect. Then find out what he expects.
I dont think its "cheating", but he does sound like a womanizer. Im sorry hes making you feel shitty.
I agree with the first two posters. He doesn't seem to be very respectful, and he does sound like a womanizer. I've always found that 'friends with benefits' don't really work out well if both parties aren't 100% certain what they expect from eachother and what is expected of them. I think you should try to sit him down and have a talk with him.
he seems very disrespectful to me, I don't know if you're together or not but if you are I'd consider it an attempt to cheat because he is asking to see another womans body. If not I'd just consider him a disrespectful womanizer!
It's things like this that really bother me. I don't mean to hijack your thread, but this makes me so sad. Honestly, everytime I turn on the tv or everywhere I turn I always see guys treating woman like they're nothing more than a piece of @ss. I'm doubtful that there are truly any real, nice men out there. When I read things like this it reminds me of things I try to push out of my memory, but keep coming back to haunt me. sigh does anyone know what i mean?
Thanks for the help guys.
Melissa...I always tried to be positive. But after this (it's still kind of going on *sigh*) I'm starting to agree with you. I feel so frustrated. He seemed almost perfect. As perfect as I thought a guy could be. And even he turns out to be a jerk. It doesn't make me feel very hopeful about other guys.
Jaded...I was ok with the friends with benifits thing until I got preg. I have no interest in having anything more serious with him. It just bothers me because he refuses to concentrate on more then one thing at a time. And he always indulges himself first. So all his stupid fantasies and 'other women' come first, and I and his baby come second. I think he should have more loyalty to me and put the baby and helping me through this pregnancy first. :?
Thanks again you guys. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who feels that it's wrong.
I'm sorry that this is something that you are having to go through. I'm going through something similer myselve the father of my baby to be is always telling me that he loves me and wants to be with me but then he goes off and is with other girls. People say it's not cheating because we aren't together. But don't you think that there should be some kinda respect if you tell someone you love them and want to be with them. hell i'm about to have his son not these other girls. He is not a horrible person and i know he does care to some point. It just seems like at times i wish that he would care more. I can't go out and be with all kinda of guys and go goof off with me friends right now and i guess at times it just seems unfare to me that he can. Sorry i went off on my own little thing but like i said i am sorry that you have to deal with this. And if you mean anything to him and if his child does then he shouldn't be fulling around with you and your emotions. Regardless of weather you are with him or not you are having or already do have his child and the should mean something not to menchine the fact that he is doing stuff with you on top of it. I hope everything works out for you and if you need to talk i'm always here.
Ashley
ansiever -- sorry I didn't reply sooner. I completely understand what you're going through though. That's the same problem I've been having with my BD. I think he should respect me for being the mother of his child and give me some props for adjusting so well to this change. He thinks that only a girlfriend gets those 'privilages'. *hugs* Stay strong. I know it's lonely and hard but in the end, I think we'll be stronger for it. Proud single mamas! 8)