I have been meaning to post this for a few days...
I saw on the gm_uprising journal that there was talk of some mamas not being a GM. So who is a GM? Is there an age limit or something that I was not made aware of?
I like to think that all of us here are GM's b/c we belong to this community. Some of us had our kids at 16 and some had them at 22 but in the end we all belong here. We have had different struggles along the way and different situations but yet we all have this in common. So when we say some of us are not GMs what does that mean? Does it mean b/c I got pregnant at 19 but b/c Xan wasn't born until I was 20 that I am excluded? I know we don't all understand exactly where the others have come from (that I can't understand all of what a 15 year old that got pregnant has had to go thru) but aren't we all still GM's? It says right on the top that this is "support, community, and education for young mamas" and thats what we all are right?
Well correct me if I am wrong please. I want to understand... thanks...
<3
I don't know. I was just turned 18 when I got pregnant. I consider myself a girlmom, but I do recognize the privilege I have because I had Trey at a later age. I had a lot of advantages over that of a pregnant 15 year old, for example. I had finished High school (no diploma, but still) and in all eyes of the law (and therefore most of society) I was considered an 'adult' so it was acceptable for me to be pregnant. I got to make my own choices instead of having to confer with a guardian. I don't really call myself a 'teen mom' because really.. I wasn't. I was a young mom. I don't pretend to know what women go through when they're 15 and pregnant, so I recognize what I have and step back and not tread on the toes of those women. I don't think there's any 'set rules' about who's a girlmom and who's not, I think most people just know to recognize the privilege that comes with age.
In my opinion, GM means a young mom. Whether she be 13 or 20. Either way we are both young, with different situations on our plates. I consider myself a GM even though I didn't have my daughter until the age of 19 and my son at 21. But maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm not. It's not up to me to decide.
I got pregnant when I was 18, Had her when I was 19 so I still fit the teen mom category, but I also though I sturggle I have no clue what it is like to be an even younger mama. I consider myself a Girlmom (even though now I'm 20) though.
I hope Im considered as a gm, I had kayla at 18 and danny 20-21
at one point earlier this year, the mdos had considered changing titles to include girlmom and older mom or some similar name. we talked about it in mods, as well as in annoincements I think. We weren't able to agree when the girlmom cut off was. at what age you were no logner considered a girlmom. it was decided that it was irrelevant and that seperating the "real" girlmoms from the older moms was not going to be beneficial or worth the hassle.
I can't place an age on who is a GirlMom. I know I am. I think when it comes to this site, all members are esentially GirlMoms, they belong to GM, this is there internet pad. When in MN, we were the GM crew, but not all of us were super yougn when we had our first. I really dont think its neccessary to put an age limit on who is a real GM.
As for the gm_uprising, my understanding was that xtra focus will be placed on the young, not-so-priveledged moms. Nothing has been decided all the way yet, and we're still in the early stages of planning, so feel free to come join the discussion! But yea, I see the uprising as a place for all who frequent GM and are in agreement about our goals.
I think our first priority here should be to support the youngest moms, the ones who likely arent getting support anywhere else. Thats why its important to reach out and show that were supportive and non-judgemental. But thats not to say we arent here to support ALL moms. I just think the biggest focus should be on the youngest mums. I also think as long as one can keep there own priveledge in mind, and recognize the differet struggles we face, we'll be that much better off.
so, that was so choppy, but i just got up and stayed up babysitting for a long time.
thanks for the replies...
yea i know a lot of times we all have to step back and look at our privledge... I just wanted to clarify it b/c it wasn't all that clear... thanks mamas
i think we had a conversation round here a while ago.
basically having a kid at 12 is different than at 15 is different than at 18 is different than at 21. all are hard & considered "young" by society.
but if yr on the older side of this spectrum, make sure that you realize you have a few more priveleges than a younger mama. like if yr over 18 you can choose a lot more about yr reproductive freedoms than under 18, for example. if yr over 16, you can drive. there are a lot lot more!
all are girlmoms, i feel, but we older girlmoms gotta make sure we aren't talking over the voices of younger girlmoms.
And those of us that had our kids at relatively young ages grow up too and eventually gain some of those priviliges that come with age- but being a twenty-nine year old mom to a thirteen year old is never the same thing as being a twenty-nine year old mom to a toddler.
I've always been kinda curious about the proportion of ages of members here. I haven't fooled around with the 'polling' option, but it might be interesting to find out.