Next year I will have a *GASP* kindergarten child in my house!! I have been seriously thinking about home schooling her, I was wondering if anyone here has/is doing it and if you had any tips for me? Thanks!
I'm planning on homeschooling my son. If you can afford to, it's definitely a good idea to join the Home School Legal Defense Association. http://www.hslda.com/
Do you have any materials yet? You can buy some at almost any bookstore, online, even at garage sales or used book stores. And you don't have to buy expensive "state-of-the-art" books or materials. Just about anything will do, as long as you cover the material as required by your state.
On the website I mentioned above, you can also find state laws and requirements if you don't already know them. There are also some great links and resources.
We've had to spend some time homeschooling my autistic son. I have to say though, it's been a group effort.
We removed him from public school after he came home with unexplained welts on his back. He spent over eight months in Gramma School.
Most recently, he's been suspended from school for just under a week. We don't have any specific materials other than JumpStart style workbooks. Typically, we've gone thru a more child directed approach. Such as at one point he was very interested in outer space. We got him space station software, videos, and coloring books.
Because of his disability, many things are difficult for him to work with, such as writing and other fine motor activities. But thru the suspension, he has learned that whether he's at school or Gramma school he has to complete the same work (actually gramma requires him to do more).
I think the most important thing that I/we've learned, is that schools have a finate amount of time they have to complete each subject. Connor's learned that whether he doesn't finish the work during "school" time or not, we have an infinate amount of time.
That was my plan earlier in my mothering gig, but it didn't work out.
I grew up with a lot of home-schooled kids who wanted to go to public school, and I went to public school and desperately begged my mother to home school me.
I grew up with a lot of home-schooled kids who wanted to go to public school, and I went to public school and desperately begged my mother to home school me.
I would love to homeschool. I think the public school system is really going down the drain. I've got awhile yet, but I am definately going to look into it when the time comes.
i was homeschool, been to private school and public. ive done it all. mymother did alot of things that gave us a better education than public school. we read lots and lots of books, went on field trips about once a week. learned alot about history and other things of interest that they dont cover in the public school. plus it is specialized attention where your child needs it. my mother got her books from a christian college. its not for every mother but its worth a try. and as far as the rumor that homeschooled kids cant adjust to social life is bs. i got straight A's my first year in public school, my grades declined every year i was there. but that could have just been me.
if homeschooling isn't an option (and it's not for many single/poor moms) or it isn't something you want to do (i personally don't have interest in homeschooling), we can still supplement the education our children get in public school (or other schools) by doing fun things that follow our kids interests and enhance their learning experiences. it can be something elaborate like going to the aquarium if they are interested in fish, or it can be something cheap and easy like making fish out of construction paper, hanging them on a blue blanket, and reading fish books from the library.
Ive decided that i am sending Laerin to school for the social aspect of it. She really knows all that ive heard of them learning in kidergarton, but she need to learn to relate to other kids. BUT! the first time she comes home bawlng that she hates school for a legitimate reason we will homeschool. I had a friend who was homeschooled and when you tok her out around anyone she woul not speak, could not act normal, she had no idea how to relate to people. Then once she learned she went wild. I however, hated junior high so much. It was a terrible time and i refuse to make my child deal with that b.s.
I'm planning on homeschooling my kids when they get to schooling age, and we already do simple basic things.
As far as the social apsect I have to wonder - I send my kid to school with 30 other little kids just like her and expect that to make her grow up to appreciate diversity. Or I can homeschool my kid and take her to the library, to nursing homes, to free ethnic festivals around the city, to shelters for women and children and teach to help out and enjoy diverse people. To me that is "socializing" much more than sitting her in a classroom of kids all either trying to be the same or be totally different and ignore each other, which is what school socializing comes down to once you hit the teenage years.
I know that it's hard for single mamas to homeschool. But I disagree that a poor mama wouldn't be able to. If you walk into your local library there are more books there than you or your child could ever read in their entire lifetime. And if you need a book that isn't there, your library can get it from one of the 500 other libraries in their inter-library loan system. As far as school supplies, you'll be expected to buy those even if your kid is in public school. And you have to pay for field trips too. It doesn't cost anything to drive your kid to the country for the day. It costs about 3 dollars to take your kid camping at a national or state park for the weekend (and less if you work weekends and need to take said kid during the week). Many places have discounts or waive fees for homeschoolers. If you need to buy a book for some reason, you get a teacher discount at most bookstores. You don't need to have expensive curriculum to homeschool your kid. If your kid gets older and you want things like math books, many public schools have a lending program for homeschoolers in the district, or you can call and see if they've just gotten new books and would be willing to sell you an old one at discount. You can even get computers and other classroom supplies this way. Shop your Library Friend's yearly book sale to get classics and older textbooks for less than a dollar each. By the time your kid gets old enough to need some brand new math and science texts, you'll be able to save for them or be in a good career and be able to pay for them. If you've got a bright kid, go to your local colleges library and teach them out of the texts there.
I think if you really want to homeschool your kid, there's a way to do it. I want to homeschool my kids and I know I can't put down a thousand dollars a year on textbooks, or even a few hundred. But I'm going to homeschool anyways. Just like you learn your resources as a young poor mama, you can do the same as a homeschooling mama.
money is a huge factor. we are not talking about the cost of supplies, we are talking about the cost of not working. and when your a single mom, sometimes thier just isnt the option of staying home.
i look forward to riley going to school, for me, its going to save me over 500 a month in child care. and if thats selfish on my part, than so be it. im sick of working my ass off, only for half of my income to go to childcare.
but than again, i have no desire to homeschool, and i have found a wonderful french immersion program that i want riley in. im happy with that.
money is a huge factor. we are not talking about the cost of supplies, we are talking about the cost of not working. and when your a single mom, sometimes thier just isnt the option of staying home.
i look forward to riley going to school, for me, its going to save me over 500 a month in child care. and if thats selfish on my part, than so be it. im sick of working my ass off, only for half of my income to go to childcare.
but than again, i have no desire to homeschool, and i have found a wonderful french immersion program that i want riley in. im happy with that.
I personally agreed that it would be very hard for a single mama to homeschool. I don't recall seeing it implied that it's selfish not to homeschool - you have to make the choice that is right for you and your child. If you feel like your child is better off in a public or private school, then you're doing what you feel best. In my post, I disagreed that it is expensive to homeschool. It's not if you know what resources you have.
Of course the cost of not working is an issue, as it always in a society where a working woman is assigned far more dollar value than a woman who chooses not to work to be home with her children. But this problem arises without homeschooling too - I am saying that homeschooling in itself does not have to be impossible simply because a mama is "poor."
i think we will be home schooling lucien but if at any point he says "i wanna go to school" we will let him.
i didnt mind public elementary/middle school, it was high school i hated. i just wanted to get my education and go to college where people (at least i thought at the time) were there because they wanted to and wanted to learn. i guess high school is a good place to learn how to deal with assholes but i just absolutely hated it. if i could have graduated early i would have.
Money is absolutely an issue. Many parents, especially young and/or single ones, cannot afford to not work in order to stay home and homeschool their kids. Some moms don't have transportation, so a trip to the countryside is not as simple as getting in the car and going. Others live IN the country or rural areas, where there is no public transportation.
You address the cost of not working a little, Skrimpy, but is it really possible for poor/single moms whose incomes are the only way living expenses are paid to decide to homeschool? For many moms, single and partnered, luxuries wouldn't be the first thing to go if we stopped working--food, electricity, etc would. There's a difference between homeschooling on a budget--which is what you addressed and is important to bring up--and simply not being able to financially afford to homeschool because you have to work.
"Socialization," to me, implies more than just making friends in school--it implies learning how to get along in society. When my child goes to school, he learns how to work in a group, that there are basic rules everyone has to follow, how to negotiate daily interactions with people his age (who aren't going to be as doting and accepting as the adults he has at home), and so on.
Homeschooling, if that's the option that's best for you and your child, is great. I just don't like to see it so oversimplified when the truth is that many moms do not have the option.
Money is absolutely an issue. Many parents, especially young and/or single ones, cannot afford to not work in order to stay home and homeschool their kids. Some moms don't have transportation, so a trip to the countryside is not as simple as getting in the car and going. Others live IN the country or rural areas, where there is no public transportation.
You address the cost of not working a little, Skrimpy, but is it really possible for a single mom whose income is the only way living expenses are paid to decide to homeschool? For many moms, single and partnered, luxuries wouldn't be the first thing to go if we stopped working--food, electricity, etc would. There's a difference between homeschooling on a budget--which is what you addressed and is important to bring up--and simply not being able to financially afford to homeschool because you have to work.
"Socialization," to me, implies more than just making friends in school--it implies learning how to get along in society. When my child goes to school, he learns how to work in a group, that there are basic rules everyone has to follow, how to negotiate daily interactions with people his age (who aren't going to be as doting and accepting as the adults he has at home), and so on.
Homeschooling, if that's the option that's best for you and your child, is great. I just don't like to see it so oversimplified when the truth is that many moms do not have the option.
Is it really possible to go back and read in my post where I said I know it would be hard for a single mama to homeschool? Is that really possible?
You speak to me as if I have money raining down on me and do not understand what it is like to be poor. My yearly income is around 5000 dollars below the poverty line. I live about 30 miles out in the county and have no car because mine needs a new engine I cannot possible afford.
I gave an example such as "driving to the country" as an alternative to an expensive field trip. Perhaps I should say "walking to the park six blocks away," or if you are marooned in the country "walking outside your front door to see nature."
Luxuries weren't what went in this household, I know the sickening fear of having your electric and water cut off because the paycheck just doesn't cut it. I understand what poverty is.
What I was trying to say is that homeschooling is possible even if you are poor. It is not poverty that makes homeschooling a "financial impossibilty" dollar-wise, because homeschooling really doesn't have to cost more than pencils and paper. It is the fact that working gives one less time to spend doing the homeschooling. And for most poor mamas school provides free care while they work, and the cost of losing that to homeschooling would be great. However, it is not, in itself, homeschooling a child that is expensive, and that is what I was trying to say. One could still "afford" to get the materials one needs to homeschool even if one is single and working because most are free. One just doesn't have the time due to working, and one loses the free child care most schools give.
Go back and read where I said it would be hard for a single mama to homeschool. I made that point and I think I did it pretty clearly. I was agreeing with Julie that that would be very hard. However, I disagreed with her that it would be very hard for a poor mama. I did not assume one way or another that a poor mama would have to work, as most of you seem to be doing. I'm sorry that that assumption has made it so hard to accept the fact that homeschooling doesn't have to be impossible due to expense.
As far as socializing, I agree that forced group work will require some interaction with other people, but I still don't consider being placed in a room with 30 other people my age who are all either trying to be alike or to ignore each other and occassionaly being forced to speak an optimal enviroment for learning the social graces.
I'm sorry that me posting about homeschooling not having to cost a lot has so terribly offended everyone. I'll just stick to saying that breastfeeding is free because that doesn't seem to be nearly as offensive.
I didn't find your post offensive, and like I said, how to homeschool inexpensively is an important discussion. Sorry if you felt attacked; that wasn't my intention.
<i>" It is not poverty that makes homeschooling a "financial impossibilty" dollar-wise, because homeschooling really doesn't have to cost more than pencils and paper. It is the fact that working gives one less time to spend doing the homeschooling. And for most poor mamas school provides free care while they work, and the cost of losing that to homeschooling would be great. However, it is not, in itself, homeschooling a child that is expensive, and that is what I was trying to say." </i>
That's what I was trying to say too, so basically, we're saying the same thing. :P I didn't see the cost of not working, and the fact that many moms can't afford to not work, addressed in your original post, so that's why I brought it up. It seems like we're on the same page now, though.
I didn't find your post offensive, and like I said, how to homeschool inexpensively is an important discussion. Sorry if you felt attacked; that wasn't my intention.
<i>" It is not poverty that makes homeschooling a "financial impossibilty" dollar-wise, because homeschooling really doesn't have to cost more than pencils and paper. It is the fact that working gives one less time to spend doing the homeschooling. And for most poor mamas school provides free care while they work, and the cost of losing that to homeschooling would be great. However, it is not, in itself, homeschooling a child that is expensive, and that is what I was trying to say." </i>
That's what I was trying to say too, so basically, we're saying the same thing. :P I didn't see the cost of not working, and the fact that many moms can't afford to not work, addressed in your original post, so that's why I brought it up. It seems like we're on the same page now, though.
Ok I see what you were saying now. I will phrase what I was trying to say another way so that maybe it will clear up my intentions in posting, since I wasn't addressing the "cost of not working" factor at all, only the raw cost of homeschooling:
Obtaining materials/planning activities in order to homeschool a child does not have to be expensive and can truly be done on pennies if one learns one's local resources :wink:
And I will give an annoying PC disclaimer: I realize that homeschooling is not a viable option for everybody and not a desirable option for every parent/child - just because I gave a pro-homeschooling post does not mean I think badly about any mama who cannot/decides not to homeschool her kid(s).
it seems like yall got it figured out, but the cost of not working was what i was addressing with my comment about poor mamas. i wouldn't put myself in the poor mamas group, and i'm not a single or unpartnered mama either, but i still wouldn't be able to homeschool, even if i wanted to. fewer and fewer two parent families these days are able to have one parent stay at home, dual incomes are needed to afford even the basics, and since welfare won't really get you anywhere, the cost of not working can be too great.
for mamas who do homeschool, have you been able to find communities and support for yourself in doing this? i ask because the homeschooling scene i've seen has appeared to be fairly dominated by conservative, religious, or traditional types. i know if i chose to homeschool, i wouldn't feel particularly comfortable in that community.
here's info about a feminist homeschooling zine put at by a really awesome former girlmom. i couldn't find a direct link, but that's an interview with Nina and at the bottom you can see how to subscribe.
I was homeschooled off and on (1st-5th grade, 8th grade, and my senior year of high school).
My parents started me out in public school because my dad was still in college and my mom needed to work. My kindergarden was terrible so my parents decided that they would find a way to homeschool. At the time we lived in Davis, CA and there was no official homeschool program set up. My parents (who were very, very poor) got together with other parents and started a homeschool group. The way that it worked, we mostly worked with our own parents, but a couple days a week parents would watch other people's kids to teach subjects that a parent might not be so good at. This time off also allowed the parents to be in school and have part time jobs. My mom worked the entire time I was homeschooling (she worked retail for a couple years and also did childcare in our house) and my dad was a grad student.
We left Davis when i was 10ish, but by the time we left the parents were organized enough that they got the county office of education to give them a large section of their building. They now have their own library, office space, and classroom space where parents can set up classes and workshops in their particular specialties. They also have a homeschool newsletter that kids get together and make each month and have frequent fieldtrips. Basically they have it set up so parents can do as much as they want themselves or can rely quite a bit on other parents (who they know and trust) to help educate their kids. It seems like a really great system and I assume there must be things like that in other places.
Another thing that is nice about the program in Davis (my best friend and her siblings all went through the program K-12) is that they allow high school students to take a few classes at a public high school so they can have that social experience (if they want it). It also allowed my friend and her brother to play high school sports. That was really important (especially to her brother) because he ended up getting college scholarships for water polo.
Basically, I don't think that homeschooling has to be an all or nothing thing. I know lots of people (myself included) who did some homeschooling and then, when school seemed the most pointless, took some time off and homeschooled or did unschooling.
You know, to be honest, maye im not prefect mommy woman, but i dont know that the first couple years that she should be in school i wouldnt be perfectly able to homeschool her. Right now i have to work, and at that time im sure i will have to still. I see how Laerin is with other kids. she really does not know how to relate to them. She goes the library, she goes to the bookstore story hours, she has friends. She is also spoiled. And try as i might to teach her taking turns, its pretty hard to do that when there are only two of us. Try to teach her to play with others, sure she knows how to play with a kid at a time, but put her in a situation with 20 of them and she doesnt. I think it would be best for her to go to school for those simple things. and as i said, the second she wants out, we will find a way to get her out and work around my and my husbands working. I know a lot of people that choose to homeschool and thats great, but i just dont feel it is the right hting for us, at least not for those first few years. And i do think being in that environment all day will help to socialize her in a possitive way. We have private school here with very small classes (about 12 students/grade) and i may send her there. We will see.
I wrote a long reply to this, but I think it disapeared.
It's funny how folks here, of all places, say that homeschooling can't be done. I was told that I couldn't manage to raise a child and finish highschool at the same time. By the time Kiddo and I left for college, folks were through telling me what I could or couldn't do.
Kiddo and I homeschooled for a year and a half, recently, but at the time I was married (still am). His best friend was also homeschooled, and his mom was single... she taught piano lessons from home and played the organ for a church and did various other musical gigs, which is unusuall, but it CAN be done, depending on the circumstances- just like everything else. For some families, taking everything into consideration, public (or even private) school is the better option, but it's not always the case. A year of that homeschooling (and the most sucessful and productive time) was spent when I was a full time graduate student. It may have contributed to the burnout that led me to drop out of the program, but it was the best thing for Kiddo at the time.
I think there's this perception that moms really have to have their shit together to homeschool, and I didn't find it to be the case. Sure, it helps if you get out of bed in the morning and don't let your kid get thier math exclusivly from Bob Barker on the Price is Right (can you tell that we did that for a while?) but we know our kids, and even sitting down with them for an hour or two to go over some math problems or discuss a website often teaches them more than kids get sitting in class and walking in straight lines and waiting for teachers to correct other kids' misbehaviors... and folks mentioned above how wonderful our libraries are... we made a point to go at least once a week, and that was just right for us. Folks that are lucky enough to have friends and supportive family nearby can have their kids spend time with them when we have to work. My son spent a few weeks with his grandparents who enthusiastically designed 'cooking courses' and 'fild and stream fishing trips.'
I miss that. Wish we were still doing that... but I sure wish for a lot of things... like financial independence, a rewarding sex life, a sense of purpose...
"It's funny how folks here, of all places, say that homeschooling can't be done. I was told that I couldn't manage to raise a child and finish highschool at the same time. By the time Kiddo and I left for college, folks were through telling me what I could or couldn't do. "
i don't think anyone said it CAN'T be done across the board, but that in certain situations its harder, and in SOME, it can't be done. If someone is a single mom needing to work three jobs, she may well find it impossible to homeschool. homeschooling is simply not an option for many women on welfare, because of the requirements to stay on it. but no one's declaring that x group is wholly incapable of doing it, which is what the teen parent arguments tend to be. i also wasn't referring to a lack of gumption or drive, which is the basis of some "you can't do that!" statements toward teen moms, but a real lack of resources.
my original post was partly to point out that yes, homeschooling generally (note generally) requires certain kinds of privilege, but mainly that we can teach and nuture our children's interests at home even if we need public school.
I think homeschooling sounds great. I'm not going to homeschool (right now anyway, I may change my mind in the future) but I found a lot of resources while looking into it as an option. A lot of it can be applied mamas of kids in public school who want to be more involved in their kids education. I agree with what julie was saying in her first responce that there's a lot you can do to stay involved in your kids education even if you don't homeschool.
Homeschooling books are a helpful for all parents some a liked are..
Guerrilla Learning: How to Give Your Kids a Real Education With or Without School by Grace Llewellyn (she has a lot of other great books on hsing)
The Unschooling Handbook : How to Use the Whole World As Your Child's Classroom by Mary Griffith
No More Prisons by William Upski Wimsatt (only part of it is about hsing)
another great resourse is local travel guides. do a search on amazon for "your state/nearest local big city with kids" & you can usually find a couple good books. also do a search for "your state/nearest local big city hiking", then check your local library for books from both lists. there are lots of possibilities when doing searches for local travel guides: your state/nearest local big city & lighthouses, ghost towns, waterfalls, beaches, missions, etc.
educational/teacher supplies stores are also a great. look in the yellow pages. there is probably at least one near you.
also most chain grocery stores have a section with workbooks. my kid loves math & these are actually a treat for him. & there are ones you wouldn't think at first were educational like books full of crossword puzzles & word searches.
you can also do google searches for free printable worksheets. if you don't have a printer call your local library & see if they have one. mine only charges 10 cents/page.
check the web sites of local museums & zoos for free days. also find out about membership. you pay a flat free for membership & can go as many times as you want throughout the year. sometime a membership to one place will give you a discount to another place. also some local museums offer classes. a local wildlife museum here offers classes for hsers & afterschool classes.
I haven't read the whole thread, and will when I have time, but I wanted to add my little tidbit. I was planning on putting Ahlianah in public school. I even had her in head start for preschool. It was great and I loved the program, but there were some serios problems and I had to pull her out. I have been looking into kindergartens. We live in one of the poorest neighborhoods in reno, and I was told by a teacher at the public school not to send my child there because the adult child ratio is unlimited for kindergarten, and many teachers have 40-50 kids per one teacher! This is unacceptable to me, and since I can't afford private school and don't have the time/energy to homeschool I looked into charter schools. I found a Montessori charter school here that I am trying to get Ahlianah into. IT is a really great program and tuition is free for first to sixth grade, plus financial aid, including grants, is available for kindergarten and pre-school. If your unhappy about your area public schools and cant afford private or homeschooling, look into charter schools, especially if you live in a city. Homeschool groups and co-ops are often a good option as well.
Thank you everyone for the advice. I recently had to pull Audrey out of pre-school because I couldn't afford it anymore (147.00 a month) and since then have been working with her at home using workbooks, etc. I'm still undecided about next year. I think the thing that bothers me the most is I'm afraid I lack the confidence in myself to do it. Also if anyone is interested (and in the states that it provides) I did find a great link that is FREE for homeschooling and supplies all materials including rental of computers: http://www.connectionsacademy.com/ They are in Arizona, California, Colorado, Florida, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin. If we do decide to homeschool that's the program I plan to use
Homeschooling for poor, single mamas is hard, not impossible, but hard. (as others have said).
I am not going to home school Zoe, maybe unskool her when she's in highskool, but if I home schooled her now, I would go nuts.
I love the idea of homeschooling-- and I was homeschooled for two years while my family lived on a sail boat, and it was amazing, but, I couldn't do it right now.
I think that as Zoe got older and as my community continues to develop, it would be easyer.
I think, also, (not that anyone has done this), but the idea among many AP parents about homeschooling is really damaging, and we need to stay away from the "if you don't WANT to homeschool your child, you are BAD!!!".
I think, also, (not that anyone has done this), but the idea among many AP parents about homeschooling is really damaging, and we need to stay away from the "if you don't WANT to homeschool your child, you are BAD!!!".
Yeah, this bothers me too- not that I've ever heard anyone say that, but there's sometimes an undercurrent like that.
I think we ALL try our best to provide for our kids' emotional and educational needs. I sure wish public schools were good in all neighborhoods and more support was available to parents so nobody would have to work three jobs just to make ends meet.
qhomeschooling is also hard for those of us with a SO, but are still poor.
Yes, there is someway we could get by with my not working and staying home to homeschool, but we would suffer somethigs.
I will probably still be in school when Laerin goes to school. It would not be impossible, but would be very very difficult for me to drive an hours to school, go to school all day, drive an hour back, and also be working. That means that all of the time I was not working or going to school i would be schooling her instead of having teaparties of playing princess.
No, it is right, that it is not impossible, but difficult, and somewhat illogical, yes.
AND JUST SO WE ALL KNOW NOW!
i did not mean it is illogical to homeschool a child. Not so at all, but illogical, meaning, probably not something that will work out, for us at this time.
didnt want anyone to take that the wrong way.
I would love to home school/unschool, but even if we coudl afford it, I couldn't do it. I am not the type of person that hasthe patience to teach children, and I need a break. I sometimes feel guilty about it, but I really shouldn't. I'm hoping maybe we can afford for Scott to homeschool one day. Doubtful, but a girl can dream.
I'm planning on homeschooling my son. If you can afford to, it's definitely a good idea to join the Home School Legal Defense Association.
http://www.hslda.com/
Do you have any materials yet? You can buy some at almost any bookstore, online, even at garage sales or used book stores. And you don't have to buy expensive "state-of-the-art" books or materials. Just about anything will do, as long as you cover the material as required by your state.
On the website I mentioned above, you can also find state laws and requirements if you don't already know them. There are also some great links and resources.
Hope that's been helpful for you, and good luck!
We've had to spend some time homeschooling my autistic son. I have to say though, it's been a group effort.
We removed him from public school after he came home with unexplained welts on his back. He spent over eight months in Gramma School.
Most recently, he's been suspended from school for just under a week. We don't have any specific materials other than JumpStart style workbooks. Typically, we've gone thru a more child directed approach. Such as at one point he was very interested in outer space. We got him space station software, videos, and coloring books.
Because of his disability, many things are difficult for him to work with, such as writing and other fine motor activities. But thru the suspension, he has learned that whether he's at school or Gramma school he has to complete the same work (actually gramma requires him to do more).
I think the most important thing that I/we've learned, is that schools have a finate amount of time they have to complete each subject. Connor's learned that whether he doesn't finish the work during "school" time or not, we have an infinate amount of time.
That was my plan earlier in my mothering gig, but it didn't work out.
I grew up with a lot of home-schooled kids who wanted to go to public school, and I went to public school and desperately begged my mother to home school me.
It was similar with me!!
I would love to homeschool. I think the public school system is really going down the drain. I've got awhile yet, but I am definately going to look into it when the time comes.
i was homeschool, been to private school and public. ive done it all. mymother did alot of things that gave us a better education than public school. we read lots and lots of books, went on field trips about once a week. learned alot about history and other things of interest that they dont cover in the public school. plus it is specialized attention where your child needs it. my mother got her books from a christian college. its not for every mother but its worth a try. and as far as the rumor that homeschooled kids cant adjust to social life is bs. i got straight A's my first year in public school, my grades declined every year i was there. but that could have just been me.
melissa
if homeschooling isn't an option (and it's not for many single/poor moms) or it isn't something you want to do (i personally don't have interest in homeschooling), we can still supplement the education our children get in public school (or other schools) by doing fun things that follow our kids interests and enhance their learning experiences. it can be something elaborate like going to the aquarium if they are interested in fish, or it can be something cheap and easy like making fish out of construction paper, hanging them on a blue blanket, and reading fish books from the library.
Ive decided that i am sending Laerin to school for the social aspect of it. She really knows all that ive heard of them learning in kidergarton, but she need to learn to relate to other kids. BUT! the first time she comes home bawlng that she hates school for a legitimate reason we will homeschool. I had a friend who was homeschooled and when you tok her out around anyone she woul not speak, could not act normal, she had no idea how to relate to people. Then once she learned she went wild. I however, hated junior high so much. It was a terrible time and i refuse to make my child deal with that b.s.
I'm planning on homeschooling my kids when they get to schooling age, and we already do simple basic things.
As far as the social apsect I have to wonder - I send my kid to school with 30 other little kids just like her and expect that to make her grow up to appreciate diversity. Or I can homeschool my kid and take her to the library, to nursing homes, to free ethnic festivals around the city, to shelters for women and children and teach to help out and enjoy diverse people. To me that is "socializing" much more than sitting her in a classroom of kids all either trying to be the same or be totally different and ignore each other, which is what school socializing comes down to once you hit the teenage years.
I know that it's hard for single mamas to homeschool. But I disagree that a poor mama wouldn't be able to. If you walk into your local library there are more books there than you or your child could ever read in their entire lifetime. And if you need a book that isn't there, your library can get it from one of the 500 other libraries in their inter-library loan system. As far as school supplies, you'll be expected to buy those even if your kid is in public school. And you have to pay for field trips too. It doesn't cost anything to drive your kid to the country for the day. It costs about 3 dollars to take your kid camping at a national or state park for the weekend (and less if you work weekends and need to take said kid during the week). Many places have discounts or waive fees for homeschoolers. If you need to buy a book for some reason, you get a teacher discount at most bookstores. You don't need to have expensive curriculum to homeschool your kid. If your kid gets older and you want things like math books, many public schools have a lending program for homeschoolers in the district, or you can call and see if they've just gotten new books and would be willing to sell you an old one at discount. You can even get computers and other classroom supplies this way. Shop your Library Friend's yearly book sale to get classics and older textbooks for less than a dollar each. By the time your kid gets old enough to need some brand new math and science texts, you'll be able to save for them or be in a good career and be able to pay for them. If you've got a bright kid, go to your local colleges library and teach them out of the texts there.
I think if you really want to homeschool your kid, there's a way to do it. I want to homeschool my kids and I know I can't put down a thousand dollars a year on textbooks, or even a few hundred. But I'm going to homeschool anyways. Just like you learn your resources as a young poor mama, you can do the same as a homeschooling mama.
I agree. I don't think money is an issue. You don't have to pay anything to home school, if you don't want to.
money is a huge factor. we are not talking about the cost of supplies, we are talking about the cost of not working. and when your a single mom, sometimes thier just isnt the option of staying home.
i look forward to riley going to school, for me, its going to save me over 500 a month in child care. and if thats selfish on my part, than so be it. im sick of working my ass off, only for half of my income to go to childcare.
but than again, i have no desire to homeschool, and i have found a wonderful french immersion program that i want riley in. im happy with that.
I personally agreed that it would be very hard for a single mama to homeschool. I don't recall seeing it implied that it's selfish not to homeschool - you have to make the choice that is right for you and your child. If you feel like your child is better off in a public or private school, then you're doing what you feel best. In my post, I disagreed that it is expensive to homeschool. It's not if you know what resources you have.
Of course the cost of not working is an issue, as it always in a society where a working woman is assigned far more dollar value than a woman who chooses not to work to be home with her children. But this problem arises without homeschooling too - I am saying that homeschooling in itself does not have to be impossible simply because a mama is "poor."
i think we will be home schooling lucien but if at any point he says "i wanna go to school" we will let him.
i didnt mind public elementary/middle school, it was high school i hated. i just wanted to get my education and go to college where people (at least i thought at the time) were there because they wanted to and wanted to learn. i guess high school is a good place to learn how to deal with assholes but i just absolutely hated it. if i could have graduated early i would have.
Money is absolutely an issue. Many parents, especially young and/or single ones, cannot afford to not work in order to stay home and homeschool their kids. Some moms don't have transportation, so a trip to the countryside is not as simple as getting in the car and going. Others live IN the country or rural areas, where there is no public transportation.
You address the cost of not working a little, Skrimpy, but is it really possible for poor/single moms whose incomes are the only way living expenses are paid to decide to homeschool? For many moms, single and partnered, luxuries wouldn't be the first thing to go if we stopped working--food, electricity, etc would. There's a difference between homeschooling on a budget--which is what you addressed and is important to bring up--and simply not being able to financially afford to homeschool because you have to work.
"Socialization," to me, implies more than just making friends in school--it implies learning how to get along in society. When my child goes to school, he learns how to work in a group, that there are basic rules everyone has to follow, how to negotiate daily interactions with people his age (who aren't going to be as doting and accepting as the adults he has at home), and so on.
Homeschooling, if that's the option that's best for you and your child, is great. I just don't like to see it so oversimplified when the truth is that many moms do not have the option.
Is it really possible to go back and read in my post where I said I know it would be hard for a single mama to homeschool? Is that really possible?
You speak to me as if I have money raining down on me and do not understand what it is like to be poor. My yearly income is around 5000 dollars below the poverty line. I live about 30 miles out in the county and have no car because mine needs a new engine I cannot possible afford.
I gave an example such as "driving to the country" as an alternative to an expensive field trip. Perhaps I should say "walking to the park six blocks away," or if you are marooned in the country "walking outside your front door to see nature."
Luxuries weren't what went in this household, I know the sickening fear of having your electric and water cut off because the paycheck just doesn't cut it. I understand what poverty is.
What I was trying to say is that homeschooling is possible even if you are poor. It is not poverty that makes homeschooling a "financial impossibilty" dollar-wise, because homeschooling really doesn't have to cost more than pencils and paper. It is the fact that working gives one less time to spend doing the homeschooling. And for most poor mamas school provides free care while they work, and the cost of losing that to homeschooling would be great. However, it is not, in itself, homeschooling a child that is expensive, and that is what I was trying to say. One could still "afford" to get the materials one needs to homeschool even if one is single and working because most are free. One just doesn't have the time due to working, and one loses the free child care most schools give.
Go back and read where I said it would be hard for a single mama to homeschool. I made that point and I think I did it pretty clearly. I was agreeing with Julie that that would be very hard. However, I disagreed with her that it would be very hard for a poor mama. I did not assume one way or another that a poor mama would have to work, as most of you seem to be doing. I'm sorry that that assumption has made it so hard to accept the fact that homeschooling doesn't have to be impossible due to expense.
As far as socializing, I agree that forced group work will require some interaction with other people, but I still don't consider being placed in a room with 30 other people my age who are all either trying to be alike or to ignore each other and occassionaly being forced to speak an optimal enviroment for learning the social graces.
I'm sorry that me posting about homeschooling not having to cost a lot has so terribly offended everyone. I'll just stick to saying that breastfeeding is free because that doesn't seem to be nearly as offensive.
I didn't find your post offensive, and like I said, how to homeschool inexpensively is an important discussion. Sorry if you felt attacked; that wasn't my intention.
<i>" It is not poverty that makes homeschooling a "financial impossibilty" dollar-wise, because homeschooling really doesn't have to cost more than pencils and paper. It is the fact that working gives one less time to spend doing the homeschooling. And for most poor mamas school provides free care while they work, and the cost of losing that to homeschooling would be great. However, it is not, in itself, homeschooling a child that is expensive, and that is what I was trying to say." </i>
That's what I was trying to say too, so basically, we're saying the same thing. :P I didn't see the cost of not working, and the fact that many moms can't afford to not work, addressed in your original post, so that's why I brought it up. It seems like we're on the same page now, though.
Ok I see what you were saying now. I will phrase what I was trying to say another way so that maybe it will clear up my intentions in posting, since I wasn't addressing the "cost of not working" factor at all, only the raw cost of homeschooling:
Obtaining materials/planning activities in order to homeschool a child does not have to be expensive and can truly be done on pennies if one learns one's local resources :wink:
And I will give an annoying PC disclaimer: I realize that homeschooling is not a viable option for everybody and not a desirable option for every parent/child - just because I gave a pro-homeschooling post does not mean I think badly about any mama who cannot/decides not to homeschool her kid(s).
it seems like yall got it figured out, but the cost of not working was what i was addressing with my comment about poor mamas. i wouldn't put myself in the poor mamas group, and i'm not a single or unpartnered mama either, but i still wouldn't be able to homeschool, even if i wanted to. fewer and fewer two parent families these days are able to have one parent stay at home, dual incomes are needed to afford even the basics, and since welfare won't really get you anywhere, the cost of not working can be too great.
for mamas who do homeschool, have you been able to find communities and support for yourself in doing this? i ask because the homeschooling scene i've seen has appeared to be fairly dominated by conservative, religious, or traditional types. i know if i chose to homeschool, i wouldn't feel particularly comfortable in that community.
here's info about a feminist homeschooling zine put at by a really awesome former girlmom. i couldn't find a direct link, but that's an interview with Nina and at the bottom you can see how to subscribe.
http://grrrlzines.net/interviews/edgy.htm
I was homeschooled off and on (1st-5th grade, 8th grade, and my senior year of high school).
My parents started me out in public school because my dad was still in college and my mom needed to work. My kindergarden was terrible so my parents decided that they would find a way to homeschool. At the time we lived in Davis, CA and there was no official homeschool program set up. My parents (who were very, very poor) got together with other parents and started a homeschool group. The way that it worked, we mostly worked with our own parents, but a couple days a week parents would watch other people's kids to teach subjects that a parent might not be so good at. This time off also allowed the parents to be in school and have part time jobs. My mom worked the entire time I was homeschooling (she worked retail for a couple years and also did childcare in our house) and my dad was a grad student.
We left Davis when i was 10ish, but by the time we left the parents were organized enough that they got the county office of education to give them a large section of their building. They now have their own library, office space, and classroom space where parents can set up classes and workshops in their particular specialties. They also have a homeschool newsletter that kids get together and make each month and have frequent fieldtrips. Basically they have it set up so parents can do as much as they want themselves or can rely quite a bit on other parents (who they know and trust) to help educate their kids. It seems like a really great system and I assume there must be things like that in other places.
Another thing that is nice about the program in Davis (my best friend and her siblings all went through the program K-12) is that they allow high school students to take a few classes at a public high school so they can have that social experience (if they want it). It also allowed my friend and her brother to play high school sports. That was really important (especially to her brother) because he ended up getting college scholarships for water polo.
Basically, I don't think that homeschooling has to be an all or nothing thing. I know lots of people (myself included) who did some homeschooling and then, when school seemed the most pointless, took some time off and homeschooled or did unschooling.
You know, to be honest, maye im not prefect mommy woman, but i dont know that the first couple years that she should be in school i wouldnt be perfectly able to homeschool her. Right now i have to work, and at that time im sure i will have to still. I see how Laerin is with other kids. she really does not know how to relate to them. She goes the library, she goes to the bookstore story hours, she has friends. She is also spoiled. And try as i might to teach her taking turns, its pretty hard to do that when there are only two of us. Try to teach her to play with others, sure she knows how to play with a kid at a time, but put her in a situation with 20 of them and she doesnt. I think it would be best for her to go to school for those simple things. and as i said, the second she wants out, we will find a way to get her out and work around my and my husbands working. I know a lot of people that choose to homeschool and thats great, but i just dont feel it is the right hting for us, at least not for those first few years. And i do think being in that environment all day will help to socialize her in a possitive way. We have private school here with very small classes (about 12 students/grade) and i may send her there. We will see.
I wrote a long reply to this, but I think it disapeared.
It's funny how folks here, of all places, say that homeschooling can't be done. I was told that I couldn't manage to raise a child and finish highschool at the same time. By the time Kiddo and I left for college, folks were through telling me what I could or couldn't do.
Kiddo and I homeschooled for a year and a half, recently, but at the time I was married (still am). His best friend was also homeschooled, and his mom was single... she taught piano lessons from home and played the organ for a church and did various other musical gigs, which is unusuall, but it CAN be done, depending on the circumstances- just like everything else. For some families, taking everything into consideration, public (or even private) school is the better option, but it's not always the case. A year of that homeschooling (and the most sucessful and productive time) was spent when I was a full time graduate student. It may have contributed to the burnout that led me to drop out of the program, but it was the best thing for Kiddo at the time.
I think there's this perception that moms really have to have their shit together to homeschool, and I didn't find it to be the case. Sure, it helps if you get out of bed in the morning and don't let your kid get thier math exclusivly from Bob Barker on the Price is Right (can you tell that we did that for a while?) but we know our kids, and even sitting down with them for an hour or two to go over some math problems or discuss a website often teaches them more than kids get sitting in class and walking in straight lines and waiting for teachers to correct other kids' misbehaviors... and folks mentioned above how wonderful our libraries are... we made a point to go at least once a week, and that was just right for us. Folks that are lucky enough to have friends and supportive family nearby can have their kids spend time with them when we have to work. My son spent a few weeks with his grandparents who enthusiastically designed 'cooking courses' and 'fild and stream fishing trips.'
I miss that. Wish we were still doing that... but I sure wish for a lot of things... like financial independence, a rewarding sex life, a sense of purpose...
"It's funny how folks here, of all places, say that homeschooling can't be done. I was told that I couldn't manage to raise a child and finish highschool at the same time. By the time Kiddo and I left for college, folks were through telling me what I could or couldn't do. "
i don't think anyone said it CAN'T be done across the board, but that in certain situations its harder, and in SOME, it can't be done. If someone is a single mom needing to work three jobs, she may well find it impossible to homeschool. homeschooling is simply not an option for many women on welfare, because of the requirements to stay on it. but no one's declaring that x group is wholly incapable of doing it, which is what the teen parent arguments tend to be. i also wasn't referring to a lack of gumption or drive, which is the basis of some "you can't do that!" statements toward teen moms, but a real lack of resources.
my original post was partly to point out that yes, homeschooling generally (note generally) requires certain kinds of privilege, but mainly that we can teach and nuture our children's interests at home even if we need public school.
I think homeschooling sounds great. I'm not going to homeschool (right now anyway, I may change my mind in the future) but I found a lot of resources while looking into it as an option. A lot of it can be applied mamas of kids in public school who want to be more involved in their kids education. I agree with what julie was saying in her first responce that there's a lot you can do to stay involved in your kids education even if you don't homeschool.
Homeschooling books are a helpful for all parents some a liked are..
Guerrilla Learning: How to Give Your Kids a Real Education With or Without School by Grace Llewellyn (she has a lot of other great books on hsing)
The Unschooling Handbook : How to Use the Whole World As Your Child's Classroom by Mary Griffith
No More Prisons by William Upski Wimsatt (only part of it is about hsing)
another great resourse is local travel guides. do a search on amazon for "your state/nearest local big city with kids" & you can usually find a couple good books. also do a search for "your state/nearest local big city hiking", then check your local library for books from both lists. there are lots of possibilities when doing searches for local travel guides: your state/nearest local big city & lighthouses, ghost towns, waterfalls, beaches, missions, etc.
educational/teacher supplies stores are also a great. look in the yellow pages. there is probably at least one near you.
also most chain grocery stores have a section with workbooks. my kid loves math & these are actually a treat for him. & there are ones you wouldn't think at first were educational like books full of crossword puzzles & word searches.
you can also do google searches for free printable worksheets. if you don't have a printer call your local library & see if they have one. mine only charges 10 cents/page.
check the web sites of local museums & zoos for free days. also find out about membership. you pay a flat free for membership & can go as many times as you want throughout the year. sometime a membership to one place will give you a discount to another place. also some local museums offer classes. a local wildlife museum here offers classes for hsers & afterschool classes.
I haven't read the whole thread, and will when I have time, but I wanted to add my little tidbit. I was planning on putting Ahlianah in public school. I even had her in head start for preschool. It was great and I loved the program, but there were some serios problems and I had to pull her out. I have been looking into kindergartens. We live in one of the poorest neighborhoods in reno, and I was told by a teacher at the public school not to send my child there because the adult child ratio is unlimited for kindergarten, and many teachers have 40-50 kids per one teacher! This is unacceptable to me, and since I can't afford private school and don't have the time/energy to homeschool I looked into charter schools. I found a Montessori charter school here that I am trying to get Ahlianah into. IT is a really great program and tuition is free for first to sixth grade, plus financial aid, including grants, is available for kindergarten and pre-school. If your unhappy about your area public schools and cant afford private or homeschooling, look into charter schools, especially if you live in a city. Homeschool groups and co-ops are often a good option as well.
Thank you everyone for the advice. I recently had to pull Audrey out of pre-school because I couldn't afford it anymore (147.00 a month) and since then have been working with her at home using workbooks, etc. I'm still undecided about next year. I think the thing that bothers me the most is I'm afraid I lack the confidence in myself to do it. Also if anyone is interested (and in the states that it provides) I did find a great link that is FREE for homeschooling and supplies all materials including rental of computers: http://www.connectionsacademy.com/ They are in Arizona, California, Colorado, Florida, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin. If we do decide to homeschool that's the program I plan to use
Homeschooling for poor, single mamas is hard, not impossible, but hard. (as others have said).
I am not going to home school Zoe, maybe unskool her when she's in highskool, but if I home schooled her now, I would go nuts.
I love the idea of homeschooling-- and I was homeschooled for two years while my family lived on a sail boat, and it was amazing, but, I couldn't do it right now.
I think that as Zoe got older and as my community continues to develop, it would be easyer.
I think, also, (not that anyone has done this), but the idea among many AP parents about homeschooling is really damaging, and we need to stay away from the "if you don't WANT to homeschool your child, you are BAD!!!".
Yeah, this bothers me too- not that I've ever heard anyone say that, but there's sometimes an undercurrent like that.
I think we ALL try our best to provide for our kids' emotional and educational needs. I sure wish public schools were good in all neighborhoods and more support was available to parents so nobody would have to work three jobs just to make ends meet.
qhomeschooling is also hard for those of us with a SO, but are still poor.
Yes, there is someway we could get by with my not working and staying home to homeschool, but we would suffer somethigs.
I will probably still be in school when Laerin goes to school. It would not be impossible, but would be very very difficult for me to drive an hours to school, go to school all day, drive an hour back, and also be working. That means that all of the time I was not working or going to school i would be schooling her instead of having teaparties of playing princess.
No, it is right, that it is not impossible, but difficult, and somewhat illogical, yes.
AND JUST SO WE ALL KNOW NOW!
i did not mean it is illogical to homeschool a child. Not so at all, but illogical, meaning, probably not something that will work out, for us at this time.
didnt want anyone to take that the wrong way.
I would love to home school/unschool, but even if we coudl afford it, I couldn't do it. I am not the type of person that hasthe patience to teach children, and I need a break. I sometimes feel guilty about it, but I really shouldn't. I'm hoping maybe we can afford for Scott to homeschool one day. Doubtful, but a girl can dream.
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