okay, so i spoke to a woman tonight that has a space for a peer-to-peer young/teen parenting support group that i want to start. it is a women's center that offers a multitude of services for girls and women, is run by pro-choice women, but has nothing for teen parents. there is one parenting class, but it is cps-mandated, and i think they have la leche league and attachment parenting international meeting there once or twice a month.
so. i'm shooting to start meeting the beginning of june, so that i'll be done with school to kick this off. i have another good friend who was a teen mama, and now has 3 kids that i'm trying to get to co-facilitate with me.
i'm thinking nothing fancy to start with, ideally there will be on-site childcare, or it will be a kid-friendly meeting, and to start maybe we'll just sit around and talk? i don't want it to be too structured but having a list of topics to address would be good.
if you were going to attend a meeting like this, what would you want to hear/talk about?
i would like to attend meetings like that, i guess id like to talk about teen impowerment . i would definately want the topicts to stay away from older moms. i hate how we feel we have to learn all the tricks to one up the older moms. i think as teen parents we lose site of ourselves individualy. we often sacrifice our own identity to be " mommie" but as young women we dont often express ourselves or meet our needs for fear we will be seen as shallow or not a real mom. i wish i had some place like that near me, all the things like that are anti choice based and really only for pregnant girls ( most are steared towards giving your kid up for adoption)
it would be nice to get around some moms my age and just talk about how you deal, and talk about our kids. I take a class like that, but it is for older moms too and i always feel like they think different of me, almost like they have to watch what they say because i am young.
so how would y'all feel if the group was run by a 26yo mama who had her kid at 19 and a 28 yo mama who had her first of 3 at 16? is it more the idea of being an older mama from the get go that would make you feel uncomfortable? i just honestly don't know many mamas a lot younger than me here, you know?
it would be cool if it was someone who had a younger outlook on life if you kwim. i think the main thing is ppl are judgemental. if you just were there but let the younger girls actually decide what to talk about and they do most of the talking that would be cool. like supervised disscusing or something kwim?
i get it. i mean, i'm not much of a planner, even in class i kind of fly by the seat of my pants sometimes, i just feel like i need to have some topics planned in case everyone decides to be really quiet the first couple of times.
what kind of topics would be good in that situation in case i need to get things going? here is what i have in mind:
~going to school while being a mama
~working while being a mama
~responses to shitty comments about your age (witty comebacks and venting about how shitty it feels)
~basic parenting concerns
~relationships with SOs (for the partnered mamas as well as dating for the single mamas)
~PPD
~things we do as mamas that make us feel good about our parenting
Those sound like good topics to me! My suggestions would be finding quality childcare, along with networking to find sitters, and maybe having a parents night out where you all go out and don't discuss parenting issues but just relax! And about the age thing...as a 25 yr old single mama who had a baby at age 19, I wish there were more groups that would include those of us who fall in that grey area. There are several groups that offer teen parent support around here, namely the YMCA and Family Life Council, but I've never been since I'm not a teen mom currrently. But the only alternative is divorce support, which doesn't really apply to me since I was never married. When I was still a teen, I would have been greatful to have had a support group of like-minded mamas who had shared similar experiences with me, regardless of their age.