Fine he is not that bad.But,how can I get him to stop tearing up his stuff?He rips holes in clothes,distroys toys,and throws his "important" (thats what he calls it=stuff)things away.I dont get this. :roll:
What happens before these destructive fits? What kinds of things get him really riled up? Is he having trouble expressing his anger and frustrations?
What happens after he does this? What have you tried? Does he think you (or someone else) will just buy him new stuff? Is he trying to get a reaction out of you?
I have some ideas about what might help, but I'd want to know more about your situation first.
IS there anything going on in his life- past or present, that would make him so angry? The issues should be dealt with at the same time as dealiung with the behavior. Good luck. Maybe some counseling would help.
Nothing is going on w/ him.My mom says he is "all boy".He does not act angry when he does this.He just does it.He says he likes holes in his clothes.His friends dont wear their clothes like that.When he tears up his toys he says he just does not like them any more.I do buy him lots of stuff.He has lots of grandparents and I have friends who buy him stuff.I try to teach him respect for his things so he will respect other people's things.I just dont know how to get him to understand.I hope you guys can help.
My first idea was to try something drastic- like removing his clothes and toys and letting him earn them back with good behavior.
He really likes holes in his clothes? Is it a 'punk' thing or something? Maybe, if that's the case, I'd try to ignore it- just let him do that, saving a nice outfit or two for special events that require intact clothes. If you don't want him to wear holey clothes to school, and you have easy access to a washer and dryer... you could send him to school every day in the same outfit until he agrees to stop doing this.
As for the stuff- maybe he's just not much of a materialist? Maybe you care more about his toys and things than he does. Definitly don't replace anything he's destroyed... and you might want to limit allowing him to have anything new until he's stopped that behavior. If folks want to give him gifts, maybe suggest that they help pay for an activity he can join instead- like sports of karate or swim classes. Show him that you're thinking about him by taking him roller skating or to the park or beach or out for an ice cream cone instead of buying something.
Wow- that sucks!
What happens before these destructive fits? What kinds of things get him really riled up? Is he having trouble expressing his anger and frustrations?
What happens after he does this? What have you tried? Does he think you (or someone else) will just buy him new stuff? Is he trying to get a reaction out of you?
I have some ideas about what might help, but I'd want to know more about your situation first.
IS there anything going on in his life- past or present, that would make him so angry? The issues should be dealt with at the same time as dealiung with the behavior. Good luck. Maybe some counseling would help.
Nothing is going on w/ him.My mom says he is "all boy".He does not act angry when he does this.He just does it.He says he likes holes in his clothes.His friends dont wear their clothes like that.When he tears up his toys he says he just does not like them any more.I do buy him lots of stuff.He has lots of grandparents and I have friends who buy him stuff.I try to teach him respect for his things so he will respect other people's things.I just dont know how to get him to understand.I hope you guys can help.
My first idea was to try something drastic- like removing his clothes and toys and letting him earn them back with good behavior.
He really likes holes in his clothes? Is it a 'punk' thing or something? Maybe, if that's the case, I'd try to ignore it- just let him do that, saving a nice outfit or two for special events that require intact clothes. If you don't want him to wear holey clothes to school, and you have easy access to a washer and dryer... you could send him to school every day in the same outfit until he agrees to stop doing this.
As for the stuff- maybe he's just not much of a materialist? Maybe you care more about his toys and things than he does. Definitly don't replace anything he's destroyed... and you might want to limit allowing him to have anything new until he's stopped that behavior. If folks want to give him gifts, maybe suggest that they help pay for an activity he can join instead- like sports of karate or swim classes. Show him that you're thinking about him by taking him roller skating or to the park or beach or out for an ice cream cone instead of buying something.