a specialone this plavce is about learning and unlearning...you have sincerely apologized and in no way does anyone want you to go we all make mistakes....as long as we recognize them and make an effort to change theres nothing wrong with that.
I know, I still felt guilty so I had to apologize again. It a nervous habit that I have yet to break
Hey all, I am posting this to apologize for something I said a long time ago. I didnt fully understand white privilege, and said things that were unacceptable on GM. I am sure I have a lot of learning ahead of me, and I did not mean to offend anyone. I value this safe space.
i forgot to add, when i made these comments, i used to nickname preciousnicole69. i changed my nickname because when i decided to come back to gm (i left for a while) i wanted a nickname more suitable for me, and since i have two daughters that i call J and M, this name suited me better.
I called the girl who my BD cheated on with me a "cunt". I think I apologized but I figured since this sticky was flashing red, I would post that. I'm sorry for using that word, I could've used something else!
I remember you, nicole
i remember you too, its been a long time!
wow lot of us have been called out but am glad we all leaned from it and apologized i have been called out too for a post i made if a mother microwaing her baby and it was made to ofreended anyone and i apologised for it :oops:
(Giant digression removed and renamed What is Privilege)
I am splitting this topic. This thread is supposed to be a valuable thread for people to learn about being called out.
thank you, adcaela
Double thank-you, adcaela. :)
i think this calling someone out is just flat out wrong. you completely take what someone says wayyyy out of context and then precede to embarass them. you make them feel so stupid and backed into a corner. it's not like we intend to offend anybody. but last i checked everyone was intitled to their option. now, i've read all these comments or posts or whatever they are. & some of yes i suppose they did need someone correcting them. but seriously some of this is a little crazy.. i feel like i'm back in was supposed to be a safe place for everyone[i]? but did you ever think about how you made the [i]other person feel? the one you called out? i think calling someone out should be taken in a more positive way. like hey that kind of offended me could you possibly re-word that please? NOT you're so judgemental how could you say that you need to read etc etc. ATTACKING someone is NOT helping. & TELLING them not to do something doesn't help either. how about some manners and ASK me not to say/do that again? i think the people who call someone out in a rude manner is just as wrong as the person who said something by mistake. we are only HUMAN. nobody is perfect. now, before someone decideds to go pyscho, or i probably shouldn't use that, before someone decides to attack me over this, make sure you're really reading this & fully understanding what i'm saying. don't just jump at the first word. put yourself in my shoes. how do YOU feel when someone is attacking you? not very good. you feel scared, embarassed, stupid, shunned. none of those feels good. i also want to say SORRY to anybody that i have "offended". it was defiently not my intentions. i absolutely hate hurting people's feelings because i know how it feels. but i don't think i should be attacked for something i didn't even realize i did.
i also want to add that i did learn from what i said. after i cooled down i realized that i need to watch what i say. to re-read everything i write. i'm not perfect, but i am going to try to do better.
let me just illistarte what gm is about. I too was uneducated when I came here 5 years ago. I didn't think that some of my opinions could affect others in the way they did. I have been " called out" but I also took the time to read the rules of gm after that. gm is a pro choice site with respect to all women and to all ways of life. We don't have to understand what the person being called out feels like because if they read the important member announcements then they would understand the rules of this site. At gm you can have a respectful opinion. ( aka if you think abortion is wrong this is not the place to voice that, or such things as making another mother feel bad about her choices) not saying you did any of those things intentionally but you must take a step back and not judge. We are all women united and we need to be there for each other no matter what or who we are.
gm is a place young mothers come to get away from the harsh society that may not understand we are capable.gm is about loving one another and helping foster relationships between the teen mother community.
"now, before someone decideds to go pyscho, or i probably shouldn't use that, before someone decides to attack me over this" this is very condescending, to me like you are making fun of our rules. I am here for you and every other mother here but we have to be respectful. you can have your own opinion but here is not the place to voice it. There are many other message boards that are accepting of everything one would want to say but gm isn't one of them. This is a safe place and I hope you understand that, its your safe place too and you wouldn't want someone coming in and making you upset.
I like this forum. It showed me that everyone makes mistakes, and I don't think anyone reacted badly in their situations. It was all learning experiences, right? I respect the women who stood up and told their perspectives.
I got "called out", not necessarily in a bad way, but with my first post I had talked about how I didn't personally believe in Abortion, though I would never judge someone if they chose that, and most definitely would not have told someone they should/shouldn't get one. I learned very quickly what Pro-choice meant. And I'm thankful that someone had said something to me right then and there. Because I felt terrible, to have worded it so badly that it offended people.
Though it is not a personal choice, I respect any woman who feels they cannot go through with an unwanted pregnancy. I'm thankful that I was able to learn before I offended anyone else.
Kanna, I'm glad that you are unlearning.
A lot of people feel that they would never get an abortion and then end up in a situation where it is the best option for them.
It's great that you're unlearning Kanna! But I do think that the sentiment "Abortion is okay, but I wouldn't do it" should be kept off of this site. We are a safe space for women who have had an abortion and saying things like that, even if it is not the intention, can come off as morally superior. It's fine to hold that belief, but not really okay to express that here.
By the way, plenty of people who have had an abortion never really thought they would be in a situation where that was the best choice for them.
I can understand this. I'm sorry if I offended anyone further with my statements, and from now on I'll keep that to myself. I just wanted to let people know that I don't want to judge anyone for decisions they have made in their lives or may make in the future. Time is always changing and so do people, it may even change for me, you never know. =)