I'm curious here as to what this is actually about. We've got several members of the glbtq community here talking about why queer isn't offensive, and a person saying it's just as offensive as the b-word, so why can't she use it?
Is this about queer being offensive, or is it more about you not being able to use the b word?
queer being offensive!
Girl-mom has already "set" or stated and we have all agreed that queer is a positive word and bitch isn't. Bitch is a negaitve, anti-woman word. Think what you want, that is fine. But seriously, don't try to change the rules about things like this.
Most glbtq people I know refer to themselves as queer. I have a friend who's a lesbian, but doesn't call herself a lesbian, but queer. And I know I have stated & several others ...
I've only ever encountered the q to mean queer, in the 13 years since I've been out, when refering broadly to the mainstream non-heterosexual community.
The "questioning" sexuality label is mainly found in youth groups as a way of welcoming youth who aren't sure of their sexual identity, a way of having a fuzzier boundary if you will, as it can be alienating if a potential group member perceives a queer space/group to be for people already established in their identity.
(I worked at a queer youth drop in centre in the late 90s).
Skykid, thanks for clarifying, I took what you said to mean words that have a more ambiguous history in a community, rather than the offensive use of identity labels.
I dislike this, it feels like you're just trying to soften the blow. People are picking words they don't want to hear based on their past mistakes, or just things that have at one time affected them. There's a better solution, but with these censors, but it's just slightly censored:
Don't _____ ____ ____ on ________, and don't be a ______ing _____ to your community. In this world, some words effect people in completely different ways. For example: "Sexist" Some women, when told they are sexist instantly flip out and try to chew you out, and claim that they 'can't be sexist'. However, there are people who wear that verbal badge on their shoulders. Act proud when they say they are feminists. To be honest, I'd much prefer the second example, at least they are being truthful to themselves and the people around them. It's a much less aggravating experience talking to someone who knows their faults.
A sharable-on-facebook be careful what you say: http://www.upworthy.com/why-you-should-say-no-to-no-homo-and-6-other-phrases-like-it?rc=p ;)