well im 5 weeks and 1 day pregnant. last night my mother was lecturing me. she started asking me all these questions about how im goona grow up and be a good mother and how she doesnt think i can do it. i mean i know ive never been a mom but what makes a difference how old i am? my mom didnt know how to be a mom when she had me, i was her first and only. mother comes naturally. i know im young and i still have college to finish but she is scared i am ruining my life. i know my life is going to change but i dont think i am ruining it. im excited to bring my first child into the worl. i will be 20 years old when he/she is born. i just dont want to constantly be fighting with my mother, i dont need the stress. when the baby is born, im not really worried about the money, there are enough resourses to help with that, and i have a good job and so does bd. im just worried i wont persure my hopes and dreams. i dont know im just ranting i guess. i just hope eveyone comes around and has a little faith in me to be the best mommy i can be.
My mother was like that in the begginning too.
Its still a new concept too her, and right now, she is just panicking. My mom stopped panicing and got excited eventually. Give it time to let the initial shock wear off, and she will probably get better.
i had the same problem at first but from my grandparents. My grandpa told me to get an abortion. I chose not too. I know how you feel even when i go out to the store or to chill with friends i get glares and people whispering behind my back. Alot of people do belive that a young woman cant care for a child. But mother hood comes naturally. I just let people think what they want.
you just really need to not listen to her and show her what you are capable of. i was twenty one when i had my daughter and i dont feel like anything in my life i could of done with or without having her. my life is full and happy and im a mom
erin you said it better than me thanks
Well i have faith in you!
thank you all for your support. im hope i can be a good mommy!
Obviously I dont know about your case in particular, but my mother was like that with me early on too. She was just worried that I wasnt really thinking properly and wasnt aware of the responsibility...she wanted to believe I would be fine, but as a parent she just worried for me. Shes so good now though..
I think with time, and as they see how committed you really are, they realise what you already knew...you can do it :)
I got pregnant with my daughter when I was 19 too and my mother thought I was making a huge mistake having my daughter. I'm 23 and my daughter is 3 and my mother has told me many times since that she thinks I'm a wonderful mother and I'm doing an amazing job. Now that I'm pregnant with my second child do you think she has faith in me? Ha, nope, I told her I was pregnant thinking I was deliver good news that my family is very happy about and she blew up in my face telling me thats horrible news. She acts so dissapointed in me and is always like 'what are you going to do now?'. Oh well I guess that is just how she is, I know she'll come around once the baby is closer and after its born, I bet your mom will too :)
....btw my mom had 5 kids when she was my age! lol
Same for me. I was 18 and hadn't even started college when I got pregnant. My mom was really devastated when I told her and pretty much told me it was the worse thing I could do to her or myself. I'm my mom's only child, too. Maybe it will help a little to figure out what it is that bothers her so much and address her concerns directly. For mine, a lot of it was worrying about my future. I told her my plan to start college and how I would manage my time, money, etc. It helped reassure her a little and when she saw my financial aid package before and after having a baby, she realized that it was definitely do-able. She also threw a lot of that "growing up" and "responsibility" stuff at me and know what? Now she tells me she can't believe how great of a mom I am and how much I've matured since having Amory. It was a rough time while I was pregnant because she was never exactly supportive, but I realized that there were differences in me and my mom that just could not be reconciled. Even if your mom doesn't do everything you wish she would (mine didn't even go to the baby shower) try to keep things neutral and understand she's worried about you. I don't like to be the downer on that part, but I know several girls whose moms just kept arguing with them or withdrew. One of the things that helped me get through it was knowing it wasn't just my mom. I really hope things work out, but just know that having faith in yourself is going to get you through the rough patches. You CAN do this.